What should my signature be?

Dave Payn

Active Member
You're asking us to help make you a plagiarist? ;-)


Oldie:

'My girlfriend asked me for an example of a double entendre; so I gave her one.'
 

HBB

Active Member
There was this whole thing the the Tune Assosiation..... so, i thought I'd ask for help from thy Trusted tMPers.

(And Dave Payn,.... one's I can understand please! :D .. and the plagerism one's only temporary) :D
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
homocidalbennyboy said:
There was this whole thing the the Tune Assosiation..... so, i thought I'd ask for help from thy Trusted tMPers.

(And Dave Payn,.... one's I can understand please! :D .. and the plagerism one's only temporary) :D

Another oldie

"Look, Daddy, here's a grave where two people are buried!" The father said, "Two people? Let me look." and sure enough, the marker said, "Here lies a symphony conductor and a humble man."
 

Di

Active Member
Censorship? We don't have any censorship. If we did, I couldn't say XXXX or XXXX.

Have you ever noticed how nothing is impossible to those who don't have to do it?

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried

OK, who stopped the payment on my reality check?
 

WhatSharp?

Active Member
"Tea anyone?, spit or sawdust?"

(see topic on emptying water on the floor :D )

BTW I would like to Congratulate Ben on receiving the Ken Dickson Memorial Trophy at this years band meal. It was given in recognition of his excellent musical contribution to the band.

He also got an award for his Tea Making, (does it every night and a marvelous cup he makes too!)

Well Done Ben.
 

geordiecolin

Active Member
For down right weirdness, try reading Hitchikers Guide to The Galaxy (all 4 volumes)
Example quotes;

"Since every piece of matter in the universe is in some way affected by every other piece of matter in the universe, it is in theory possible to extrapolate the whole of creation, from, say, one small piece of fairy cake."

or

"My commander told me that the entire planet was in danger of being eaten by an enormous mutant star goat."

or

"Somewhere in the cosmo, he said, along with all the planets inhabited by thousands of humanoid, reptiloids, fishoids, walking treeoids there was also a planet given over to Biro life forms."

or

"This time however, something was happening. A mattress had just met a robot."

Slightly weird I know, and only appeal to a certain sense of humour.....
 
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