Things you learn from TV advertisements

Maestro

Active Member
Dave Payn said:
35. Certain brands of sanitary towel can help you run, jump, swim and play tennis. The uncertain ones obviously can't.



Brilliant news.....I've always wanted to them 4 things :lol: :lol:
 

JessopSmythe

Active Member
WhatSharp? said:
24 - NOTHING COSTS A ROUND NUMBER!

[boc]Daft as it sounds, instore that's an anti theft measure. If something costs exactly £10, people are usually going to pay with a £10 note, allowing the spotty checkout operator to slip the tenner in his pocket without ringing anything into the till. If it costs £9.99 they have to ring a sale into the till in order to open it so they can give you the change.[/boc]
 

Cornishwomble

Active Member
40. Even if you've lost your job, your wife and kids. You're on the bones of your bum and look like you've not washed for months, with just 4 bits of information you can get straight through to an attractive woman who is dying to lend you at least £25,000!

41. Everyone in advertland has a kitchen bigger than my flat.

42. Linda Barker has the easiest life in advert history and should never ever be allowed to act.

43. Castlemaine XXXX and Fosters is brewed in the UK and Bertomello italian sauces are made in Holland

44. Using Lynx deoderant spray will mean that the fat, lazy old boiler who works down the spar shop will be replaced by your dream woman

45 All rubbish CDs are not available in any shop and can only be bought via Admail!
 

Okiedokie of Oz

Active Member
Roy Taylor said:
44. Using Lynx deoderant spray will mean that the fat, lazy old boiler who works down the spar shop will be replaced by your dream woman

Or in Australia, it at least allows you to be totally irrestible to any good looking female, and makes them wanna boink you like crazy
 
46. Mice play bagpipes, and cats are not the slightest bit interested because they would rather eat thier wiskers - would have thought that with all the noise the owner might come and investigate.

47. Sainsbury's makes life taste better........mmm, does anyone fancy going to lick the shop wall? :wow
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
VenusTromster said:
46. Mice play bagpipes, and cats are not the slightest bit interested because they would rather eat their wiskers - would have thought that with all the noise the owner might come and investigate.

He's probably quite happy smoking his cigar called hamlet :wink: :lol: :lol:
 

lynchie

Active Member
48. you can get a car insurance quote with a single piece of arbitrary information, eg "It's a hatchback"!
 
PeterBale said:
VenusTromster said:
46. Mice play bagpipes, and cats are not the slightest bit interested because they would rather eat their wiskers - would have thought that with all the noise the owner might come and investigate.

He's probably quite happy smoking his cigar called hamlet :wink: :lol: :lol:

or letting his joose loose aboot this hoose! :wink:
 

Darth_Tuba

Active Member
Things adverts tell you... hmmm...

-Large groups of friends don't go out on the beer, they stop in and eat Doritos and talk crap.
-Nobody swears before 9 pm.
-It is impossible for David Beckham to sound macho... even when he tries in that Pepsi mock western thing.
-It is very easy to get out of debt by getting another loan.
-Mr Muscle is a sentient being that is capable of loving the jobs you hate.
-It is impossible to "sit on the fence" when it comes to marmite.
-Things can be whiter than white. What they really mean is they can make 'em slightly blue so you think they are whiter.
-People who own 4x4s take them off-roading and NEVER use them to take the kids to school half a mile down the road instead of them walking like they should!
-If there are lots of adds for cod liver oil, odds are your watching Countdown.
-Neil Morrisey and Leslie Ash live together in real life as well! They also seem to be doing the house up 24/7.
-And for those that remember: no one can see Bob Hoskins walking through their house talking loudly about BT while they are on the phone.
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
49. The bank manager lives in the cupboard, unless you're with the Woolwich

50. There's something we've all got to tell Syd - but I can't remember what it is :!:
 

NeilW

Member
51. Batty old women shop at Tesco's

We had a researcher come and ask if we'd be prepared to use our house for a "Sizzle & Stir" ad - the one where the prizewinning mechanic is too busy cooking his meal to hear there's a broken down bus full of "dancers". Fortunately (or maybe not :p ) they filmed it somewhere more isolated...

Neil.
 

James Yelland

Well-Known Member
53. You can be sure of a big smile and a friendly welcome when you visit Kwikfit.

54. People who advertise toothpaste are specially chosen for their ability to brush their teeth without a horrid foamy mess dribbling out of their mouths.

55. Parents are only too happy to allow their children to go off with a bulky bearded man to a remote location on the promise of some free fish fingers.
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
56. We may have all watched John Collier's window, but it didn't stop them going bust - maybe we should have gone inside and bought something :wink:

57. It looks good, tastes good, but we're not allowed to say that it "does you good" any more :!:

58. Ladies cleaning carpets have so much time to spare and enjoy it so much that they do a little song and dance act at the same time :shock:
 

JessopSmythe

Active Member
59: It is possible to drive your car through the surf on a beach, towing a water skier without getting any dirt on the car.
 

JessopSmythe

Active Member
61: You'll never have to wait in line at a supermarket checkout

62: Every washing powder is better than all the others (in a kind of M C Escher never-ending-staircase type way) despite the fact that most of them are made by the same company
 

BigHorn

Active Member
63. Sanitary towels only ever soak up blue liquid.

64. Diarrhoea treatments make you skip though flower meadows with a stupid grin on your face.

65. Nobody ever gets embarrased when asking for incontinence pads or preparations for heamaroids or yeast infections. The cheerful chemist always has a pack to hand and does not have to shout to her colleague "How much for this jumbo tube of pile cream".
 

Product tMP members are discussing

Top