Poetry

frisp

Member
Recently the BBC ran a 'Limerick Challenge' (thx Skins for the heads up), recognising the limerick as part of National Poetry Day.

As a sad limericker, who has contended himself with lurking recently (a bit Dickensian I know), I thought a Tmp version might be in order:-

Supply the next four lines to any one of the following please :-

A Bass Player stood and he said,

The MD he frowned and he swore,

A young man who's called Roger Thorne,

There once was a young man in Goa,

Forgive me implored the sop cornet,
 

frisp

Member
I'll try :-

Forgive me implored the sop sornet
I blew far too hard and I've torn it
My insides are out
Folks point and they shout
My shame is quite hard but I've borne it!!!!!!!!!!!
 

frisp

Member
A Bass player stood and he said
I've blown the top off my head
We're expected I know
To give a huge blow
But it's robins are meant to be red..
 

frisp

Member
There once was a young man in Goa
Whose wife had a pink feather boa
She left him quite smart
She seemed a young tart
She whores in Hawaii, aloha!!!!


:p :p :p
 

frisp

Member
The MD he frowned and he swore
These cornets are just such a bore
He had a quick fit
And looked fresh at it
Lets bring the back row to the fore!!
 

lynchie

Active Member
A young man who's called Roger Thorne,
Was musical when he was born,
His back mum would pat
And he'd burp a B flat
And then fart a concerto for horn.
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
A bass player stood and he said
"I think that my partner is dead;
He first saw the flavours
Of those semiquavers -
Then decided he'd conk out instead".


The MD he frowned and he swore
As he glanced down and looked at the score:
"You're playing it wrong -
The notes are too long -
I'll just have to show you the door.

A young (?) man who's called Roger Thorne
Wrote music from dusk until dawn.
When asked why he did so
He danced a calypso
Then arranged it for flugel and horn.

There once was a young man in Goa
Who called all his friends on the blower:
He said "How's yer doing,
Is anything brewing?"
Then blew up - just like Krakatoa.

"Forgive me" implored the sop cornet,
"I think I've just swallowed a hornet!
It went down my throat,
I can't play a note,
I might as well just go and pawn it."
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
frisp said:
Recently the BBC ran a 'Limerick Challenge' (thx Skins for the heads up), recognising the limerick as part of National Poetry Day.

As a sad limericker, who has contended himself with lurking recently (a bit Dickensian I know), I thought a Tmp version might be in order:-

Supply the next four lines to any one of the following please :-

A Bass Player stood and he said,

The MD he frowned and he swore,

A young man who's called Roger Thorne,

There once was a young man in Goa,

Forgive me implored the sop cornet,

The MD he frowned and he swore
'I can't ******* take any more!'
You play your brass
Like it comes out your ****
And your tuning's just so bleedin' poor!

Edit: Please keep it clean. Dyl. :wink:
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
lynchie said:
A young man who's called Roger Thorne,
Was musical when he was born,
His back mum would pat
And he'd burp a B flat
And then fart a concerto for horn.

10 out of 10 and then some! :lol:
 

lynchie

Active Member
Dave Payn said:
lynchie said:
A young man who's called Roger Thorne,
Was musical when he was born,
His back mum would pat
And he'd burp a B flat
And then fart a concerto for horn.

10 out of 10 and then some! :lol:

I thank you! I put it down to years of intensive training, and a twisted personality...
 

frisp

Member
Brill, lynchie! :p :p :p

The MD he frowned and he swore
..but chuckled a little bit more
He laughed at the horns
Gave up with tromborns
Told cornets to blow like a whore!
 

frisp

Member
There once was a young man in Goa
His Hawaiin wife said "aloha"
He gave a small sigh
While eating a pie
And confessed that his real name was Noah :oops:
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
The MD he frowned and he swore
That he meant to conduct it in four,
But the band went too fast
And the moment was past,
So it's one in a bar like the score.
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
[
Edit: Please keep it clean. Dyl. :wink:[/quote]

Apologies, Dyl. I was taking the 'swore' element perhaps a little too literally!
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
A young man who's called Roger Thorne
Discovered his trousers had gorn -
He still kept his hat on
And wiggled his baton
Looking just like the day he was born.
 

lynchie

Active Member
A Bass Player stood and he said,
"I want to play tuba instead,
The tuba at best
Gets 100 bars rest
So I get one more hour in bed"
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
A bass player stood up and said
"I'm fed up of earning no bread".
He got on the 'phone
And bought a trombone,
So now he goes gigging instead.
 

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