Phobile moans

Ann-Marie

Member
Back ON topic! I used to have a Siemens (can't remember the model number) - it was awful for texting with though. Now back to a good old Nokia - not a brick but I can actually manage to find it in the bottom of my bag :roll:
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
Ann-Marie said:
As Dave and Bruce live at opposite ends of the country does that mean those of us living in Manchester (or anywhere in between) have to be on the lookout for low flying tin cans at all times?

Oh, look - a Vimto can just flew past my office window in a Southerly direction, urgent text for My Payn :shock:

'Urgent text for My Payn'. Since when has anybody been able to text Anadin to anyone??

We live in different countries, not opposite ends of one! ;-) No need to fear yet, anyway. AM. We're both working on string extension techniques, once we'd exhausted all attempts from that well known practical book 'How Long Is A Piece Of String' To papaphrase a very old joke, we got so far, only for the string to twirl up and become worn. I asked Bruce: 'Does this string work'? only for him to reply 'Fraid not'........ :shock: :roll:
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
Dave Payn said:
I asked Bruce: 'Does this string work'? only for him to reply 'Fraid not'........ :shock: :roll:
I'm afraid you'll have to start another thread to find the answer to that one :wink:
 

Keppler

Moderator
Staff member
So this is the reason why physicists manage to keep in such close contact.. They use superstrings..

and it's also the reason why we can't understand their conversation.. seeing as they attempt to converse on p dimensions, (which is why physicists are called "p-branes", incidentally) These extra dimensions converge during conversation on the superstring, allowing the unfortunate on the other end to hear the conversation.
Unfortunately, for p > 1, those theories are non-renormalizable, and so noone has any idea what physicists are talking about...


Tremendous apologies for this butchering of the classic superstring theory, by the way
 

bruceg

Active Member
I read Stephen Hawking's "Brief History Of Time" a few years back and remember him talking about string theory. Now I may be paraphrasing (badly) here but as I understand it all you need to do is have space-time fold in on itself, hand the drink can with note attached to the recipient then stand well back before it all unravels again. Seems pretty straightforward when I say it like that... ;)
 

bruceg

Active Member
Keppler said:
seeing as you're using extra-dimensions, (p of them) I dub thee a p-brane..

:D :D

Cheers for that Kepps though it's not the first time it's been said and I doubt it'll be the last :D
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
And of course, the coke tins never gave off any radiation. Just the pungent acrid smell of the drink that once occupied it....... ;-)
 

bruceg

Active Member
We really tried our hardest to kill this thread yesterday but it just won't die :D All these people and mods (I know - mods are people too) who either want to get back on/off topic or confuse us with physics :? Let it go people - there's only so much you can say about string (useful stuff string but not in 3 inch lengths - name the Monty Python album Dave - please).

;)
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
bruceg said:
We really tried our hardest to kill this thread yesterday but it just won't die :D All these people and mods (I know - mods are people too) who either want to get back on/off topic or confuse us with physics :? Let it go people - there's only so much you can say about string (useful stuff string but not in 3 inch lengths - name the Monty Python album Dave - please).

;)

Contractual obligation?
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
Dave Payn said:
Contractual obligation?
You mean "the party of the first part etc" a la Marx brothers?

No, sorry, that would be for third party calls :oops:

(What's that? - Oh that's the sanity clause!
Don't be silly, there ain't no Sanity Claus!)
 

bruceg

Active Member
I think you're right - that's the one I thought it was on but I wasn't sure. There was another I used to listen to on vynil which was "double threaded" and would play differently depending which groove the stylus landed in. Does that ring any bells?
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
bruceg said:
I think you're right - that's the one I thought it was on but I wasn't sure. There was another I used to listen to on vynil which was "double threaded" and would play differently depending which groove the stylus landed in. Does that ring any bells?

Nope. New one on me! Contractual Obligation album had my all time favourite Python song. 'I like Traffic Lights'!
 

bruceg

Active Member
Don't forget "Finland Finland Finland - the country where I quite want to be" or the angst-ridden "Baggage retrieval system at Heathrow". My favourite was the version of the medical song they did on that album but I won't repeat any of the lyrics for fear of being mod'd :D
 

WhatSharp?

Active Member
Dave Payn said:
bruceg said:
I know. I've seen up to three mods monitoring this forum and none of them have intervened. I fear that I shall be forced to put pen to paper, attach with selotape and hurl a coke can in the direction of the music man himself. Disgraceful really...

It'll have to be that unless your length of string is sufficient to relay messages from Scotland to Wales. (Do you remember if it cost more to text/call with coke tins to other countries in the UK?)

And thats not the half of it!, Don't forget the Coke - Iron Bru compatibility issue!, that was a nightmare to sort out.
 

WhatSharp?

Active Member
Back on the topic of Tins'n' String, I was involved in with a number of reasearchers who where looking at using Pigeons. Problem was we had to use a specially coated piece of string or the little s*ds wouldn't swallow it!.

That and the 3 hour wait before you could make a connection made the whole thing pretty useless. Shame really cause we reckon it would really have taken off up in northern England.

We also experimented with using ferrets to carry the text messages. Unfortunatley they usually ended up the wrong persons trouser. Did bring out some specials for Valentines day by they were a bit boisterois and tended to nip a bit. We had several complaints from the wives and girlfriends of the testers that we had ruined their day completely!
 

WhatSharp?

Active Member
Do I get an award for killing this thread?

btw,

I recently unearthed some old research on the use of elastic instead of strings!. It seems that the molecular density of the elastic was much more amenable to sending pictures scribbled on a bit of card, not only that but the wider the elastic the further it could stretch and the more information could be passed down it. I think they called it Broadband.....

I'll get me coat....
 

Dave Payn

Active Member
WhatSharp? said:
Do I get an award for killing this thread?

btw,

I recently unearthed some old research on the use of elastic instead of strings!. It seems that the molecular density of the elastic was much more amenable to sending pictures scribbled on a bit of card, not only that but the wider the elastic the further it could stretch and the more information could be passed down it. I think they called it Broadband.....

I'll get me coat....

Kill it??? You've just re-invigorated this thread!

Modern coke cans and the like suffer from a disadvantage for those wanting to go 'retro'. The old ring pulls could be torn off the top of the can and with the ring pull attachment, flicked. Useful, if all other attempts at sending a text message or calling failed, because with enough practice, one could flick these ring pulls and hit the recipient directly on the forehead, thereby alerting the recipient that the 'texter' or 'caller' was trying to get in touch.
 

WhatSharp?

Active Member
The other probem is that the fizzy drinks manufacturers are increasingly converting to bottles which are wholely unsuitable for you avarage call. Great for those overseas calls (if a little slow) but useless for a local "string" call.

However the one small ray of light is that with the increasing redundancy for tin openers on your modern baked bean tin (which has a ring pull mechanism rather than a fixed lid) these are increasingly coming back into fahsion. A Slight disavantage is that unless washed properly private calls are always noticable by the tell tale spot of sauce on the nose.
 
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