Medical Definitions


Supporting Member
Ever wondered what those complicated sounding medical terms actually mean. Well here's your answer:

• Benign: What you be after you be eight.
• Artery: The study of paintings.
• Bacteria: Back door to cafeteria.
• Barium: What doctors do when patients die.
• Caesarean Section: .A neighbourhood in Rome.
• Catscan: Searching for kitty.
• Cauterize: Made eye contact with her.
• Colic: A sheep dog.
• Coma: A punctuation mark.
• D & C: Where Washington is.
• Dilate: To live long.
• Enema: Not a friend.
• Eyedropper (i'-drop-ur): A clumsy ophthalmologist.
• Fester: Quicker than someone else.
• Fibula: A small lie.
• Genital: Non-Jewish person.
• G. I. Series: World Series of military baseball.
• Hangnail: What you hang your coat on.
• Impotent: Distinguished, well known.
• Labour Pain: Getting hurt at work.
• Medical Staff: A Doctor's cane.
• Morbid: A higher offer than I bid.
• Nitrates: Cheaper than day.
• Node: Was aware of.
• Outpatient: A person who has fainted.
• Pap Smear: A fatherhood test.
• Pelvis: Second cousin to Elvis.
• Post Operative: A letter carrier.
• Recovery Room: Place to do upholstery.
• Rectum: Darn near killed him.
• Secretion: Hiding something.
• Seizure: Roman emperor.
• Tablet: A small table.
• Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport.
• Tumour: More than one.
• Urine: Opposite of you're out.
• Varicose: Nearby, close by.
• Vein: Conceited

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