Jack E
Well-Known Member
Half of us will come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem.
I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe.
I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
Still haven't decided where to go for my summer holiday ----- The Living Room or The Bedroom?
Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pyjamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
Home schooling is going well. Two students suspended for fighting and one teacher fired for drinking on the job.
I didn't think that when we changed the clocks, we'd go from GMT to the Twilight Zone.
This morning I saw a neighbour talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood every word she said. I came into my house, told my dog - and he CRACKED up!
After this mass house arrest, the producers of 'My 600 Pound Life' will be spoilt for choice, won't they?
Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called The Kitchen. You have to get together all the ingredients and make your own meal. Dunno how the place didn't go bust years ago . . .
My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.
I've just sent a message off to a social media influencer. It's time to take out the bin-bag; what should I wear?
I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Backgardena del Sol. I'm getting tired of Los Livingroom.
Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.
Day 5 of home schooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat. I'll be so disappointed if it's a hoax . . .
I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe.
I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
Still haven't decided where to go for my summer holiday ----- The Living Room or The Bedroom?
Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pyjamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
Home schooling is going well. Two students suspended for fighting and one teacher fired for drinking on the job.
I didn't think that when we changed the clocks, we'd go from GMT to the Twilight Zone.
This morning I saw a neighbour talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood every word she said. I came into my house, told my dog - and he CRACKED up!
After this mass house arrest, the producers of 'My 600 Pound Life' will be spoilt for choice, won't they?
Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called The Kitchen. You have to get together all the ingredients and make your own meal. Dunno how the place didn't go bust years ago . . .
My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.
I've just sent a message off to a social media influencer. It's time to take out the bin-bag; what should I wear?
I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Backgardena del Sol. I'm getting tired of Los Livingroom.
Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.
Day 5 of home schooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat. I'll be so disappointed if it's a hoax . . .