How clumsy are you?
- Thread starter Dave Payn
- Start date
Andy_Euph
Active Member
Well knowing me the last thing I probably broke was wind... but in the past i've had some interesting breakages, probably thet best one being...
When I was in sixth form i remember we were all trying to kill a fly (aint it amazing what sh*te you do in free lessons) anyway yours truely saw it settle on the window.... flying fist... window.... big hole in window.... fly flies away unharmed. I'd completely missed and ended up putting my fist and in fact whole arm through the window, cue endless mocking from my mates.
When I was in sixth form i remember we were all trying to kill a fly (aint it amazing what sh*te you do in free lessons) anyway yours truely saw it settle on the window.... flying fist... window.... big hole in window.... fly flies away unharmed. I'd completely missed and ended up putting my fist and in fact whole arm through the window, cue endless mocking from my mates.
skweeky
Member
not exactly a breakage but a funny injury non the less.....
Whilst on tour to Germany two years ago, a fellow bandsman (unamed) decided to jump off his bed, in the pitch black, on to the floor in a quick dash to the lavatory (or wherever it was he was jumping quickly to in the middle of the night). The next thing that happend is the whole hotel was awakened by a blood curdling scream and, being in the same room as this bandsman, i sat up in bed and asked what was going on.....
After getting up and turning the light on i found that the scream came from this leaping bandsman and he had landed on a continental adaptor plug (the ones with two pins in one end and holes for a three pinned plug in the other) and one of the pins had gone all the way into his foot :shock: ouch!!!!!!!
Anyway we had to call the German paramedics out at silly hours in the morning to remove a plug from the inside of his foot! It was the most hilarious injury i have come across yet
Whilst on tour to Germany two years ago, a fellow bandsman (unamed) decided to jump off his bed, in the pitch black, on to the floor in a quick dash to the lavatory (or wherever it was he was jumping quickly to in the middle of the night). The next thing that happend is the whole hotel was awakened by a blood curdling scream and, being in the same room as this bandsman, i sat up in bed and asked what was going on.....
After getting up and turning the light on i found that the scream came from this leaping bandsman and he had landed on a continental adaptor plug (the ones with two pins in one end and holes for a three pinned plug in the other) and one of the pins had gone all the way into his foot :shock: ouch!!!!!!!
Anyway we had to call the German paramedics out at silly hours in the morning to remove a plug from the inside of his foot! It was the most hilarious injury i have come across yet
skweeky said:not exactly a breakage but a funny injury non the less.....
Whilst on tour to Germany two years ago, a fellow bandsman (unamed) decided to jump off his bed, in the pitch black, on to the floor in a quick dash to the lavatory (or wherever it was he was jumping quickly to in the middle of the night). The next thing that happend is the whole hotel was awakened by a blood curdling scream and, being in the same room as this bandsman, i sat up in bed and asked what was going on.....
After getting up and turning the light on i found that the scream came from this leaping bandsman and he had landed on a continental adaptor plug (the ones with two pins in one end and holes for a three pinned plug in the other) and one of the pins had gone all the way into his foot :shock: ouch!!!!!!!
Anyway we had to call the German paramedics out at silly hours in the morning to remove a plug from the inside of his foot! It was the most hilarious injury i have come across yet
SHOCKING!! :roll: :wink:
When I was a kid i tried riding a bike that had no pedals, just the metal spindle that the pedal should be on.
I'd got a right head of steam up and was belting down the road when not surprisingly my feet slipped of the pedals and i did one of those desparate manouvres where you desparately try your best to cling on to the bike for grim death with the bike wobbling and careering all over the place and when i finally came off and tried to untangle myself from the bike the metal pedal spindle had gone and punctured it's way into my ankle and I had to get my brother to pull it out. I still have the scar.
And I once went to the chippie for my elder brother to get fish and chips twice, two breadcakes and a fish cake but insisted on going on his bike (which was way too big for me). On the way back from the chippie the bag of fish and chips got wedged between the front forks and the wheel and totally ruined the bag of fish and chips as well as wrecking the front wheel.
Rotten sod made me eat the lot (not including wheel.)
I'd got a right head of steam up and was belting down the road when not surprisingly my feet slipped of the pedals and i did one of those desparate manouvres where you desparately try your best to cling on to the bike for grim death with the bike wobbling and careering all over the place and when i finally came off and tried to untangle myself from the bike the metal pedal spindle had gone and punctured it's way into my ankle and I had to get my brother to pull it out. I still have the scar.
And I once went to the chippie for my elder brother to get fish and chips twice, two breadcakes and a fish cake but insisted on going on his bike (which was way too big for me). On the way back from the chippie the bag of fish and chips got wedged between the front forks and the wheel and totally ruined the bag of fish and chips as well as wrecking the front wheel.
Rotten sod made me eat the lot (not including wheel.)
louise0502
Member
broke a hole punch and both the office staplers at work last week but i also managed to work out how to put them back together again!
Big Twigge
Active Member
When living in uni halls I managed to melt an electric kettle by putting it on a hob :shock:
It wasn't that I was trying to boil the water this way I was just a fool and didn't realise which hob was on and where I was putting the kettle....needless to say a quick journey to argos was made before the cleaner noticed
It wasn't that I was trying to boil the water this way I was just a fool and didn't realise which hob was on and where I was putting the kettle....needless to say a quick journey to argos was made before the cleaner noticed
When at school in cookery class I had to make an apple crumble, being awful at cooking I was proud of my effort as I put it in the oven. Unfortunately I'd put the crumble in a plastic dish, which exploded causing the oven to catch fire.
Needless to say I was banned from cooking at school thereafter!
Needless to say I was banned from cooking at school thereafter!
littlemisshorns
Member
I'm really quite clumsy but not for breaking things - more for banging my head off of cupboard doors, or stubbing my foot on the bed post, or falling out of bed (did that yesterday), just doing various things like that!
nickjones
Active Member
Well In my defence....the playing surface of the footie pitch was deadly...sand , rain...in feb 2002...this is how it happendRambo Chick said:nickjbeaumarisband said:My Wrist.... :shock: a week before I flew to America and Bermuda in 2002 , playing football , should act my age and not my shoe size...
i broke my wrist too!! falling when dancing along an icy road!!
so safe to say im also pretty dumb as well as clumsy!!
Carolyn
get a call from a mate " Jonesy fancy a game of footie???" :roll:
me "blimey charlie...too right "
running about for 5 mins like a loony I fall after running back to save ( stick the fat lad in Goal they said..Doh!!!!!)
cue visit to local hospital in footie kit ( my Lucky Wolves shirt..trainers , shin pads... :evil: they didnt get chance to work )...question from doctor , "well Mr. Jones how did you do this "
:roll: :wink: Well after a lungfull of Laughing gas and a overnight stay in Hospital.. was given the ok to fly to America..
lynchie
Active Member
Big Twigge said:
After witnessing the random throwing things all over the place at the areas, I think there is definitely a clumsy gene knocking about in your family!
Personally I'm only clumsy when drunk... I have been known to walk into walls, get knocked down by parked cars, and smash mobile phones into little pieces, all while under the influence...
akwarose
Active Member
we were in cooking at school (me and the teacher had a mutual understanding... hate each other quietly) and i got a tray of fairy cakes out of the oven. this hadnt gone too well, and they were more like fairy killing stones.......
i put the really hot tray on my plastic lunchbox lid (to keep it off the nice new worktop) and melted it......as far as i know bits of the plastic lid are still stuck to the work surface...........
and i set fire to a bin in science. someone gave me a bunch of lighted splints, and they were really close to burning my had, so i threw them in the bin without thinking and it caught fire, my teahcer was not impressed. i was banned from practicals for the rest of the year and was put on science report.....
so i am kinda clumsy, or just downright stupid.... you decide
i put the really hot tray on my plastic lunchbox lid (to keep it off the nice new worktop) and melted it......as far as i know bits of the plastic lid are still stuck to the work surface...........
and i set fire to a bin in science. someone gave me a bunch of lighted splints, and they were really close to burning my had, so i threw them in the bin without thinking and it caught fire, my teahcer was not impressed. i was banned from practicals for the rest of the year and was put on science report.....
so i am kinda clumsy, or just downright stupid.... you decide
Does this count as clumsy?
The follwoing events happend over the last few years...
Parked my car at Band forgot to put the handbrake on and it rolled backwards in to the bass players car (Who happened to be my dad)
At a contest a number of years ago I managed to swing through a large window.
I have over 30 stitches in my head and extensive dental work due to falling over; running into walls etc. and a golf club
At work I have managed to break 3 laptops (dropping 2 and pouring coffe over another) and 7 mobile phones.
I dropped a railway sleeper on my foot and had to miss a most of the marching jobs a couple of years ago.
And last month I was just leaving the house to set of for an important meeting noticed I had a flat tyre and whilst changing managed to snap the head of the nut (so had to call RAC out) my front door key got jammed in the door so was locked out of the house( had to call a locksmith who are not cheap!!)
Got everything sorted set off for the meeting stopped for a coffe and spilled it all down my shirt and tie - generally a bad day!!
This list is endless....
The follwoing events happend over the last few years...
Parked my car at Band forgot to put the handbrake on and it rolled backwards in to the bass players car (Who happened to be my dad)
At a contest a number of years ago I managed to swing through a large window.
I have over 30 stitches in my head and extensive dental work due to falling over; running into walls etc. and a golf club
At work I have managed to break 3 laptops (dropping 2 and pouring coffe over another) and 7 mobile phones.
I dropped a railway sleeper on my foot and had to miss a most of the marching jobs a couple of years ago.
And last month I was just leaving the house to set of for an important meeting noticed I had a flat tyre and whilst changing managed to snap the head of the nut (so had to call RAC out) my front door key got jammed in the door so was locked out of the house( had to call a locksmith who are not cheap!!)
Got everything sorted set off for the meeting stopped for a coffe and spilled it all down my shirt and tie - generally a bad day!!
This list is endless....
ScrapingtheBottom
Active Member
akwarose said:
Next time you do that tell your science teacher you're just doing a "combustion experiment".
Cornet_player
Member
Soppy said:Last thing I broke was my cornet
Make up your own mind about me then
Remind me not to leave my cornet out then! :lol: :lol:
The last thing that I broke (with the help of my brother) was a Pyrex dish!! Just wondered if it would bounce :? :lol: :shock:
drummergurl
Active Member
best one ive seen actually happened yesterday!!! (i wasnt the cause of this!!)
it was absolutely hilarious! i was in science (biology) and we were doing an experiment invoving bunsen burners, beakers of water, leaves and ethanol.
now actually wot ur thinking is that someone set the ethanol on fire, well they didnt. they were actually keeping their bunsen burner well away from the ethanol, and put their lit bunsen by the wall, the flame was quite high and their was a display just above their bunsen!!! they ended up setting the display on fire, and actually didnt notice until someone shouted the displays on fire! so our teacher got the fire blanket and placed it against the wall while the rest of the class stood there laughing! we then filed out of the room coz we couldnt exactly breathe very well. and no1 set the fire alarm off. there was a PE lesson on outside our room and we all filed out laughing and they stood there watching us!
it was absolutely hilarious! i was in science (biology) and we were doing an experiment invoving bunsen burners, beakers of water, leaves and ethanol.
now actually wot ur thinking is that someone set the ethanol on fire, well they didnt. they were actually keeping their bunsen burner well away from the ethanol, and put their lit bunsen by the wall, the flame was quite high and their was a display just above their bunsen!!! they ended up setting the display on fire, and actually didnt notice until someone shouted the displays on fire! so our teacher got the fire blanket and placed it against the wall while the rest of the class stood there laughing! we then filed out of the room coz we couldnt exactly breathe very well. and no1 set the fire alarm off. there was a PE lesson on outside our room and we all filed out laughing and they stood there watching us!
groovy
Active Member
Reading above I'm quite tame....ran into a wall and gave myself a black eye. Also this morning cracked my head off a wall, owww. Fall over a lot, ie down stairs at school into large crowds of people. It wasn't me but at music camp my beloved (borrowed) Conn got a huuuge dent! Still hiding it from teacher!
It wasn't me but at music camp my beloved (borrowed) Conn got a huuuge dent! Still hiding it from teacher!