DEATH IN THE BOX - a tMP Murder Mystery


Active Member
You guys are certainly demanding! BT and I have combined our braincell to produce Episode 3...

Led by Leisa and Dyl, the tMPers mounted the stairs to the Master Bedroom, unprepared for the sight that would greet them. Sprawled across the bed was Nadia, stabbed through the heart with what appeared to be the stiletto heel of a dancing shoe. Immediately CG paled - was it hers? No, this was silver and hers were gold. Even so, she couldn't help feeling that somehow she had been implicated in this ghastly crime. Leisa was shaking.

"I think it's my shoe," she gulped, making a move to retrieve it. "DON'T TOUCH IT! I mean it's evidence," said Dyl, rather red in the face and trying to regain his butler dignity. "What's in his hand?" asked Sparkly. The group turned to look. In Nadia's right hand was a large piece of brandy-soaked fruitcake. Sparkly edged up to it and sniffed it. "That brandy's off," she said. Instantly Chief Cook MichelleGarbutt elbowed her way through. "It can't be, I only made that cake yesterday for t'Master!" she exclaimed indignantly. She inspected the piece and started up in amazement and anger. "A'reet then, which one of yous has put something into my cake?"

Silence. "You don't mean....poison?" asked Seedhouse, whose nervous disposition was being stretched to its limits and beyond. "Well I'm not volunteering to try it and check!" Michelle was incensed at the apparent criticism she was receiving and stormed off to the kitchen to be comforted by her husband Stan, Nadia's chief handyman.

Dyl broke the seemingly endless silence. "I think we should all adjourn now. This has to be a matter for the police." He ushered everyone out of the room, shutting the door behind them and turning back to the bed...

In another part of town, the local hostelry in Wilsden had been invaded by DI Kepps and his team. The landlady was rather impressed with their restraint, just ordering Cokes all morning. Little did she know that Twigglet, being a canny young lady, had secreted her bottle of vodka in her organiser handbag cum hand grenade that she took everywhere with her. Worried about the exorbitant prices in pubs nationwide, she felt it a wise precaution. Nice idea Twigglet, thought DI Keppler. Only one problem - she hadn't accounted for the inexperience of their work experience students. Maybe a pub wasn't such a good place to teach them the finer points of interrogation...

"So Neil, what do you say to an uncooperative subject?" asked Kepps. "Um....get your coat, you've pulled?" GeordieColin at this point began to giggle and promptly choked on his vodka and listerine. Slapping him vigorously the back, Twigglet cast Kepps a despairing look. How had they ended up with these two on the team?

Half an hour later, interrogation training was complete. And Neil and Colin were drunk. In the days to come DI Kepps would wonder why on earth he had let them loose on the suspects...

In the makeshift incident suite at Nadia Towers, Keppler was interviewing Roger Thorne. "Mr. Thorne, were you aware that the deceased known as Straightmute had left you the ownership of Dragon Music Publishing?" RT was silent for a moment. "I am surprised. I always felt he was bitter that I sold more than him. And the battle over signing tMP arrangers was fierce." "So you were enemies." "No." "You disliked each other." "No. We were friends." "So you would have no reason to wish him dead." "None."

Next door, Twigglet was plying the hapless Dyl with vodka. He was visibly moved by the demise of Nadia, fondly recalling their hat swapping days in Birmingham. He was, however, rather aggrieved that when the tMP community was being established his horn-playing prowess counted for nothing and he was reduced to a mere understairs nonentity. Twigglet passed the Kleenex and loaded another tape into the recorder. This may be interesting...

It was definitely a big mistake to let the work experience students loose on suspects. By the time they'd finished, HomocidalBennyBoy had been charged with possession of a violent avatar, Leisa had been sentenced to a night out with them and Darth Tuba was VERY afraid. Once Keppler had restored order and sent the young detectives to bed without any cake, order resumed.

Sparkly had assumed the motherly role she excelled in, and in a moment of inspiration felt that the late Nadia would have welcomed an almighty p***-up in his honour. Dyl was dispatched to the cellars to fetch the finest hand-pulled beers and spirits. Jessop Smythe would run the bar, making sure it stayed open all night for the thirstier tMPers. Dave Payn was checking the DJ's CDs to make sure none were illegal, although Vickitorious would have knocked him out if he'd found any, ably assisted by Dinie. tMM was quietly eating some cake, worried about his flock. Darth Tuba was getting noisily drunk in honour of his partner in crime. As the evening progressed tongues were loosened and nobody noticed the chameleon-like Twigglet with her tape recorder. As Timbloke fired up the dancefloor with some adventurous footwork, Leisa and Dave Payn danced slowly, whispering in each other's ears. Attracting some attention, they were watched by the group until eventually Euph-Bari strode up and separated them. "What's going on?" he demanded. Both flushed. "I was comforting Leisa and she was looking after me. That's no crime!" muttered Dave Payn. "We were talking through the night. Trying to make sense of everything. Nothing else. I swear Jez nothing else!" cried Leisa.

At this point tempers flared. Suddenly Leisa found herself being accused of murder. Bagpuss decided to start a fight by throwing a stick at Jessop Smythe who promptly CLOSED the bar in revenge. Sparkly and tMM stood wringing their hands in horror as the party disintegrated into chaos.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, came the haunting sound of the tenor horn. This was accompanied by the sound of tapping feet and mutters of "Doran you BOC!!!"

"That sounds like...." "Nah..." "It is - surely!"



Rach x


:idea: I reckon the cake's got something to do with it. If it was poisoned, why was tMM eating it....??

Or then again I may be way off the mark!


Nadia wrote:
why is everyone queueing up to kill me?!

Answers on the back of a stamp please...

Rach x

Fear not Aidan - even in death, it appears you are set to continue haunting us all, no doubt armed with a wide selection of interesting there's a scary thought :shock:


Staff member
I reckon I must have done it in a fit of insanity - I don't remember anyfink, guvnor, but I seem to have mysteriously disappeared :!: :shock: :eek:

Okiedokie of Oz

Active Member
So this has gone from a Sherlock Holmes to a Frankenstein? Walking dead and such??????????

Y'see, this would NEVER had happened, if the TMP event was held this side of the pond!!! :wink:

Big Twigge

Active Member
Ahhh the twists and turns.....
CG you surprise me with how you manage to transform our little ideas into a gripping piece of literature!


Active Member
haha genius :D
doran is a boc though to be fair...
I just ordered my tmp tshirt with "BOC" on the back yesterday :D:D:D


Active Member
Excellent!! 8) I'm well impressed you can write the episodes quickly - it takes me ages to do the soap. :?


Active Member
Yay ... although a boring part --- I hated work experience! :D

Keep it coming ... (and I be the masked magician! :? :p)


"Nice One Y'all"


Active Member
Valvecap said:
Can you put a disclaimer on your other half??? lol

I've been trying too... :wink:

Better watch out though - offending the author can seriously damage your survival prospects! :twisted:

Rach x