Dear Technical Support

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2, which
I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently
conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and
run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other
applications, such as Lads Night Out 3.1, Football 3pm, and Playboy 6.9.
Successive versions of Girlfriend proved no b! etter. A shareware program,
Party Girl 2.1, which I tried, had many bugs and left a virus in my system,
forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks.

Eventually, I tried to run Girlfriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same
time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other,
they caused severe damage to my hardware. I then upgraded to Fiancée 1.0,
only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife
1.0. While Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does
come bundled with FreeSex Plus and Cleanhouse 2002. Shortly after this
upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 can be very unstable and costly to
run.

Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and
could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had
forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary Explorer and
E-mail Filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Whinge.
These latter prod! ucts have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what
the problem is.

Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly, requiring
ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express which needs to
be reinstalled every other week. Wife 1.0 also spawns unwelcome child
processes that drain my resources. These conflict with some of the new
games I wanted to try out, warning me that they are an illegal operation.
Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Audi TT hard drive, it often
crashes.

Wife 1.0 also comes with a rather annoying pop-up called Mother-In-Law,
which can't be turned off, stopped or reasoned with. Recently I've been
tempted to install Mistress 2003, but there could be problems. A friend of
mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2003, it
tends to delete all of your Money files before uninstalling itself.

Please Help :lol:
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
Sounds as though you may have performed an illegal operation and need to be shut down - or perhaps it was a run-time error - not fast enough :wink: :lol: :lol:
 

tubbythetuba

New Member
Try divorce 4.1 which will unfortunately require overdraft 2.1 or possibly remortgage 5.

You could them move to Girlfriend 2.1 through to 2.15, or simply use bonkfest 4.

Please try to avoid Wife 2.0 seems a good idea and at first runs more efficiently than Wife 1.0, however has a tendency to invoke Jealousy 4.1 which can cause severe operating errors.

Good luck
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
A few years ago, most people ran 2.4 children, but things may have changed a bit since then!
 

James McFadyen

New Member
Software overload!!! Time to fdisk and reformat and install Linux, I'm sure those software titles arn't available for Linux, but a something tells me that a few budding programmers on this post will bring out a Linux version.

:wink:
 

PeterBale

Moderator
Staff member
Not computers, but technical in its own way, and saves opening up another thread :lol:

Spotted in today's newspaper:

J.C.Pegrum said:
We had to call a plumber recentlywho had an unusual boss connecting fitting.
The instructions read: 'Tighten thrust nut using suitable spanners or wenches until a solid resistance is felt.'
. . . and who said women were no good with D.I.Y. :?: :wink: :lol:
 

MartinT

Member
As regards the virus infection, I suggest installation of appropriate patches and a firewall prior to launching PartyGirl 2.1. You should be aware that no guarantees can be made as to the behaviour of shareware and freeware.

:)
 

bagpuss

Active Member
With regard to the bugs inherent in Party girl 2.1, it is possible to get penicillin 4 (times per day) from certain sources. You may also find that if party girl 2.1 or even girlfriend 1.0/1.2 become too much of a problem, introducing desparate mate 3.1 could solve the problem by removing party girl 2.1 and girlfriend 1.0/1.2 from your system completely.

With regard to your problem with wife 1.0 storing errors in its memory, I have always found that liberal applications of vodka 50 (ml) can cause this memory to be difficult to access and easily corrupted.

The Audi TT hard drive crashes are a difficult problem to solve. The only way that I know to get around this is to remove Audi TT hard drive and replace with a much lesser model (mini metro for example) until such time as wife 1.0 has successfully completed it's learn to BLEEP drive 2.1 upgrade. It is then advisable to slowly increase hard drive potential (VWpolo then Ford Focus etc.etc) until an acceptable hard drive level is reached. One unfortunate side effect of this is that if you try to ascertain the reason for these Audi TT hard drive crashes, FreeSex plus will probably be removed without warning and for an indeterminate length of time. Only after Red roses 12 and/or chocolate 5.3 can this hope to be retrieved.

One final word of warning. NEVER attempt to introduce Threesome deluxe to your system. This invariably results in Slap v3 being launched and can result in damaged hardware. Also FreeSex plus may be deleted from your system completely and TurboStrop/Whinge will replace your normal operating system.

Hope this helps



Puss
 
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