View Full Version : The Limerick contest
Teflon1961
06.02.2007, 00:38
Thanks to Edward Lear and the A-A-B-B-A, let's introduce a new thread where by when the previous limerick finishes, we start a new one!
The challenge is to try and avoid all the ones that we already know and create some new ones, I'm sure we've all sung ....."sing us another one, just like the other one...etc" on the band bus?
Please try to leave enough time for any previous posts to be included and please try to add only ONE line at a time! Also, copy all the previous lines in to create a final 5 line poem in the same post, that way the next new Limerick starts with a single line....good luck!
I'll start in traditional style by intoducing a person and a place..
There was a young lady from Devon...
timbloke
06.02.2007, 09:49
There was a young lady from Devon...
There was a young lady from Devon,
Who joined Brighouse when she was just seven,
DannyCollin
06.02.2007, 11:57
There was a young lady from Devon,
Who joined Brighouse when she was just seven,
There was a young lady from Devon,
Who joined Brighouse when she was just seven,
To start with on Horn,
Teflon1961
06.02.2007, 11:58
There was a young lady from Devon,
Who joined Brighouse when she was just seven,
Originally on Horn,
as interests were torn,
There was a young lady from Devon,
Who joined Brighouse when she was just seven,
Originally on Horn,
as interests were torn,
she died and she went to heaven.
There was a big lad from kent,
.....
Teflon1961
08.02.2007, 17:38
There was a big lad from kent,
Who's intentions were always well meant
Ipswich trom
08.02.2007, 18:05
There was a big lad from kent,
Who's intentions were always well meant,
The girl that he met
There was a big lad from kent,
Who's intentions were always well meant,
The girl that he met,
flew off in a jet,
Ipswich trom
09.02.2007, 07:45
There was a big lad from kent,
Who's intentions were always well meant,
The girl that he met,
flew off in a jet,
So he went on a diet for lent.
There was a young flautist from Fife
davidquinlan
09.02.2007, 09:22
There was a big lad from kent,
Who's intentions were always well meant,
The girl that he met,
flew off in a jet,
So he went on a diet for lent.
There was a young flautist from Fife
There was a young flautist from Fife
Who was sentanced to prison for life..
timbloke
09.02.2007, 09:24
There was a young flautist from Fife,
Who was never to good with a knife,
D'oh just beat me.... Scrap my previous line.....
There was a young flautist from Fife
Who was sentanced to prison for life..
For playing too sharp,
davidquinlan
09.02.2007, 10:16
There was a young flautist from Fife,
Who was never to good with a knife,
D'oh just beat me.... Scrap my previous line.....
There was a young flautist from Fife
Who was sentanced to prison for life..
For playing too sharp,
There was a young flautist from Fife
Who was sentanced to prison for life..
For playing too sharp,
In a duet with a harp....
Ipswich trom
09.02.2007, 15:04
There was a young flautist from Fife
Who was sentanced to prison for life..
For playing too sharp,
In a duet with a harp....
It led to divorce from his wife.
3 Horns from a band in the west...
davidquinlan
09.02.2007, 15:08
There was a young flautist from Fife
Who was sentanced to prison for life..
For playing too sharp,
In a duet with a harp....
It led to divorce from his wife.
3 Horns from a band in the west...
3 Horns from a band in the west...
got drunk at the wigan bier fest....
timbloke
09.02.2007, 15:08
3 Horns from a band in the west,
Thought of themselves as the best,
D'oh, how do you keep doing that!
Ok I'll take your line,
3 Horns from a band in the west,
got drunk at the wigan bier fest,
As they lifted their Steins,
Pops2501
10.02.2007, 12:00
3 Horns from a band in the west,
got drunk at the wigan bier fest,
As they lifted their Steins,
3 Horns from a band in the west,
got drunk at the Wigan bier fest,
As they lifted their Steins,
they called out "IT RHYMES!!"
3 Horns from a band in the west,
got drunk at the Wigan bier fest,
As they lifted their Steins,
they called out "IT RHYMES!!"
3 Horns from a band in the west,
got drunk at the Wigan bier fest,
As they lifted their Steins,
they called out "IT RHYMES!!
Which is lucky, cos rhymes are the best!
One night in the dark and the rain...
Pops2501
10.02.2007, 14:56
One night in the dark and the rain...
One night in the dark and the rain
one tall Bb bass player came...
Morghoven
10.02.2007, 18:43
One night in the dark and the rain
one tall Bb bass player came...
To band on his bike...
davidquinlan
10.02.2007, 19:55
To band on his bike...
He tripped on a pike..
Pops2501
10.02.2007, 20:25
He tripped on a pike..
And his mouthpiece was never the same (bum, bum!!)
Band Contest time's here - what a joy...
PeterBale
12.02.2007, 18:22
Band Contest time's here - what a joy...
Band Contest time's here - what a joy,
For every band girl and band boy . . .
timbloke
12.02.2007, 21:49
Band Contest time's here - what a joy,
For every band girl and band boy,
A test piece they'll play,
DannyCollin
12.02.2007, 22:06
Band Contest time's here - what a joy,
For every band girl and band boy,
A test piece they'll play,
AND THE JUDGES WILL SAY,
3 Horns from a band in the west,
Thought of themselves as the best,
D'oh, how do you keep doing that!
Ok I'll take your line,
3 Horns from a band in the west,
got drunk at the wigan bier fest,
As they lifted their Steins,
They felt their designs!
meandmycornet
13.02.2007, 00:18
Band Contest time's here - what a joy,
For every band girl and band boy,
A test piece they'll play,
AND THE JUDGES WILL SAY,
Band Contest time's here - what a joy,
For every band girl and band boy,
A test piece they'll play,
And the judges will say,
BAND NUMBER TWO ARE THE REAL MCCOY!
can I start the new one too please?.... thank you!
THE OTHER DAY I WAS TWENTY ONE,
PeterBale
13.02.2007, 08:07
THE OTHER DAY I WAS TWENTY ONE,
I thought it would be so much fun;
meandmycornet
13.02.2007, 14:57
The other day I was Twenty-One,
I thought it would be so much fun,
but alas I was wrong,
The other day I was Twenty-One,
I thought it would be so much fun,
but alas I was wrong,
The other day I was Twenty-One,
I thought it would be so much fun,
but alas I was wrong
though they sang me a song,
meandmycornet
13.02.2007, 15:04
The other day I was Twenty-One,
I thought it would be so much fun,
but alas I was wrong,
though they sang me a song,
I threw up straight from my tum!
Teflon1961
13.02.2007, 18:27
3 Horns from a band in the west,
got drunk at the wigan bier fest,
As they lifted their Steins,
They saw Frazer Hines
PeterBale
13.02.2007, 18:36
3 Horns from a band in the west,
got drunk at the wigan bier fest,
As they lifted their Steins,
They saw Frazer Hines
With "Emmerdale" tattooed on his chest.
Teflon1961
13.02.2007, 18:42
With "Emmerdale" tattooed on his chest.
LOL.. ROFLMAO!!
Come on Pete.. it's your start!!!
PeterBale
13.02.2007, 18:45
The players got ready one day . . .
Teflon1961
13.02.2007, 18:47
The players got ready one day . . .
when they suddenly heard the MD say
PeterBale
13.02.2007, 18:57
The players got ready one day . . .
when they suddenly heard the MD say
We've got the errata . . .
Morghoven
13.02.2007, 19:04
The players got ready one day
When they suddenly heard the MD say
We've got the errata...
...and it says, for a starter,...
timbloke
13.02.2007, 19:32
The players got ready one day
When they suddenly heard the MD say
We've got the errata,
and it says, for a starter,
That there are two bars missing from the second cornet part between bars 181 and 183, a crescendo missing from the flugel part in bar 31, the solo trombone part has been printed upside-down, all the crotchets in the bass parts should be quavers......etc, etc,
Teflon1961
13.02.2007, 23:56
timbloke..!!!:clap:
Lovely ending, though a slight problem with the scanning!!!:rolleyes:
anyway... your start I believe?....
The players got ready one day
When they suddenly heard the MD say
We've got the errata,
and it says, for a starter,
That there are two bars missing from the second cornet part between bars 181 and 183, a crescendo missing from the flugel part in bar 31, the solo trombone part has been printed upside-down, all the crotchets in the bass parts should be quavers......etc, etc,
I believe the ONE line rule just flew out the window as did the start a new one when youve finished rule did!
and that doesn't even rhyme!! :-?
Teflon1961
15.02.2007, 09:30
I believe the ONE line rule just flew out the window as did the start a new one when youve finished rule did!
and that doesn't even rhyme!! :-?
Really funny though!
Oh well... Timbloke seems to have gone awol, so I'll take the plunge!
Here goes!
Old Smithy had trouble with mutes...
timbloke
15.02.2007, 13:01
Sorry, had work to do today!
As for the scanning on my previous last "line" (and it was only one line, just a very long one), I'd planned to go on longer but got bored!
Old Smithy had trouble with mutes,
He mistook them for bell ended flutes,
bigmamabadger
15.02.2007, 17:34
Old Smithy had trouble with mutes,
He mistook them for bell ended flutes,
He attempted to blow it
Teflon1961
15.02.2007, 17:43
Old Smithy had trouble with mutes,
He mistook them for bell ended flutes,
He attempted to blow it
but then had to show it..
and now he can't give two hoots!
<restart>
A diminutive bass player called Ron.....
Teflon1961
16.02.2007, 00:39
A diminutive bass player called Ron
brought a box for use later on
bigmamabadger
16.02.2007, 09:21
A diminutive bass player called Ron
brought a box for use later on
He stood up on top
Teflon1961
16.02.2007, 16:27
A diminutive bass player called Ron
brought a box for use later on
He stood up on top
and said to the Sop'
timbloke
16.02.2007, 16:44
A diminutive bass player called Ron
brought a box for use later on
He stood up on top
and said to the Sop'
"My fear of high places has gone"!
This time I'll remember to start a new one,
Big Dave was a star Baritone....
bigmamabadger
16.02.2007, 17:30
Big Dave was a star Baritone....
As a maestro he stood all alone
PeterBale
16.02.2007, 18:07
Big Dave was a star baritone,
As a Maestro he stood all alone;
When black notes abounded . . .
bigmamabadger
16.02.2007, 19:09
Big Dave was a star baritone,
As a Maestro he stood all alone;
When black notes abounded . . .
He had them surrounded
Ipswich trom
16.02.2007, 23:58
Big Dave was a star baritone,
As a Maestro he stood all alone;
When black notes abounded
He had them surrounded,
Good job he wasn't a trombone.
There once was a drummer from Fife....
PeterBale
17.02.2007, 00:20
There once was a drummer from Fife....
Who hated bagpipes all his life . . .
Bass Man
17.02.2007, 01:12
There once was a drummer from Fife....
Who hated bagpipes all his life . . .
So he chose to take action
...put a piper in traction...
Ffion Flugel
17.02.2007, 14:35
And stopped him from seeing his wife
A trombonist from Crouch End on Sea ...
Bass Man
17.02.2007, 14:55
A trombonist from Crouch End on Sea ...
Played a B-flat instead of a C
brassneck
17.02.2007, 15:50
A trombonist from Crouch End on Sea ...
Played a B-flat instead of a C
He said he was right
Teflon1961
17.02.2007, 16:30
A trombonist from Crouch End on Sea ...
Played a B-flat instead of a C
He said he was right
Though the 7th was bright
A trombonist from Crouch End on Sea ...
Played a B-flat instead of a C
He said he was right
Though the 7th was bright
And the euph player was playing an E!
In Essex, it's sometimes been said,
Teflon1961
17.02.2007, 16:50
In Essex, it's sometimes been said,
That taking your cornet to bed
brassneck
17.02.2007, 17:15
In Essex, it's sometimes been said,
That taking your cornet to bed
Annoys poor old teddy.
bigmamabadger
17.02.2007, 20:57
Annoys poor old teddy.
Who's always been ready
Ffion Flugel
17.02.2007, 21:08
And terribly easily led
For those who are in love with Arban ...
brassneck
17.02.2007, 23:37
For those who are in love with Arban,
May as well be wearing a kaftan,
For those who are in love with Arban,
May as well be wearing a kaftan,
The music's the same
PeterBale
18.02.2007, 09:25
For those who are in love with Arban,
May as well be wearing a kaftan,
The music's the same,
It's just like a game . . .
Ipswich trom
18.02.2007, 09:56
For those who are in love with Arban,
May as well be wearing a kaftan,
The music's the same,
It's just like a game,
Even if it's a bit of an ard'n!
The adjudicator at our last contest.....
Pops2501
18.02.2007, 12:02
The adjudicator at our last contest.....
Turned up - only wearing his vest...
PeterBale
18.02.2007, 13:12
The adjudicator at our last contest.....
Turned up - only wearing his vest...
When writing remarks . . .
Ffion Flugel
18.02.2007, 13:31
The adjudicator at our last contest.....
Turned up - only wearing his vest...
When writing remarks . . .
He deducted most marks ...
PeterBale
18.02.2007, 13:51
The adjudicator at our last contest.....
Turned up - only wearing his vest...
When writing remarks . . .
He deducted most marks ...
From the band most folk thought was the best.
The vest that he wore had a hole . . .
Ipswich trom
18.02.2007, 13:52
The adjudicator at our last contest.....
Turned up - only wearing his vest...
When writing remarks,
He deducted most marks,
From the band that had played it the best! :redface:
Ipswich trom
18.02.2007, 13:53
Woops, forgot to start the mext one!
Whilst watching the band in the park......
Ffion Flugel
18.02.2007, 14:28
Woops, forgot to start the mext one!
Whilst watching the band in the park......
It suddenly went rather dark...
PeterBale
18.02.2007, 15:09
Whilst watching the band in the park......
It suddenly went rather dark...
They called for some lamps . . .
bigmamabadger
18.02.2007, 15:37
And turned up the amps
Ffion Flugel
18.02.2007, 15:40
And the baris were covered in sparks
At a concert in Preston Guildhall ...
At a concert in Preston Guildhall
'Twas found that the timps were too small,
bigmamabadger
18.02.2007, 17:23
At a concert in Preston Guildhall
'Twas found that the timps were too small,
They brought an Inflator
PeterBale
18.02.2007, 18:25
At a concert in Preston Guildhall
'Twas found that the timps were too small,
They brought an Inflator -
Supplied by a waiter -
Pops2501
18.02.2007, 19:22
At a concert in Preston Guildhall
'Twas found that the timps were too small,
They brought an Inflator -
Supplied by a waiter -
And then had to take out a wall!
Two welsh trombone players called Jones...
Were always getting pelted with stones,
Ffion Flugel
18.02.2007, 19:48
Said Geraint to Dai
Teflon1961
18.02.2007, 19:48
Were always getting pelted with stones,
By the baris, and Euphs and the 'bones
bigmamabadger
18.02.2007, 22:26
Said Geraint to Dai
Think we've lost scansion somewhere here.
Limerick:
A, A, B, B, A
:p
Two Welsh tombonists named Jones
were always getting pelted with stones
Said Geraint to Dai
Gracious me, I must fly
Ffion Flugel
18.02.2007, 23:03
Two Welsh tombonists named Jones
were always getting pelted with stones
Said Geraint to Dai
Gracious me, I must fly
And learn how to do semitones
Ffion Flugel
19.02.2007, 13:45
Oops, slight delay whilst visiting Aberystwyth ...
A Young cornet player named Sid ...
Ipswich trom
19.02.2007, 14:51
A Young cornet player named Sid,
Lacking a mute, used a lid
PeterBale
19.02.2007, 15:26
A Young cornet player named Sid,
Lacking a mute, used a lid;
By grabbing the handle . . .
A Young cornet player named Sid,
Lacking a mute, used a lid;
By grabbing the handle
And lighting a candle..........
Teflon1961
19.02.2007, 17:25
A Young cornet player named Sid,
Lacking a mute, used a lid;
By grabbing the handle
And lighting a candle
Of loud notes he was eternally rid.
Whilst Peter was playing a duet
Whilst Peter was playing a duet,
No top or bottom notes could he get,
bigmamabadger
19.02.2007, 22:24
Whilst Peter was playing a duet,
No top or bottom notes could he get,
he took a deep breath
brassneck
19.02.2007, 22:33
Whilst Peter was playing a duet,
No top or bottom notes he could get,
He took a deep breath,
Drank creme de menthe.
PeterBale
20.02.2007, 07:27
Whilst Peter was playing a duet,
No top or bottom notes he could get,
He took a deep breath,
Drank creme de menthe.
And then had to go see the vet!
A trio of horns in the band . . .
Teflon1961
20.02.2007, 10:56
A trio of horns in the band . . .
Supped beer 'til they just couldn't stand
A trio of horns in the band . . .
Supped beer 'til they just couldn't stand
It doesn't take much
PeterBale
20.02.2007, 11:46
A trio of horns in the band . . .
Supped beer 'til they just couldn't stand
It doesn't take much
If you're all going Dutch . . .
A trio of horns in the band . . .
Supped beer 'til they just couldn't stand
It doesn't take much
If you're all going Dutch
To drink all the booze in the land!
One day, while visiting Skegness
PeterBale
20.02.2007, 12:00
One day, while visiting Skegness
A cornettist tried on a dress . . .
One day, while visiting Skegness,
A cornettist tried on a dress
His name was Craigy.... :tongue:
timbloke
20.02.2007, 12:43
One day, while visiting Skegness,
A cornettist tried on a dress,
His name was Craigy,
He looked great as a lady,
dazzyboy
20.02.2007, 12:46
One day, while visiting Skegness,
A cornettist tried on a dress,
His name was Craigy,
He looked great as a lady,
But his makeup was a great blo ody mess
One day whilst playing a march
One day whilst playing a march,
The band passed under an arch
PeterBale
20.02.2007, 13:27
One day whilst playing a march,
The band passed under an arch;
The bass drum tapped twice . . .
bigmamabadger
20.02.2007, 14:58
One day whilst playing a march,
The band passed under an arch;
The bass drum tapped twice . . .
Then slipped on the ice
Ffion Flugel
20.02.2007, 15:07
And his sticks ended up up his .. nose
Whilst playing at Monday's rehearsal ...
PeterBale
20.02.2007, 15:18
Whilst playing at Monday's rehearsal
I suffered a minor reversal . . .
Ffion Flugel
20.02.2007, 16:56
I went back to the sign
Whilst playing at Monday's rehearsal
I suffered a minor reversal
I went back to the sign
and ended up on cloud nine
Whilst playing at Monday's rehearsal
I suffered a minor reversal
I went back to the sign
and ended up on cloud nine
Where I experienced a nasal dispersal! :tongue:
There was a young lady from Brum.....
There was a young lady from Brum,
who wanted to play a drum,
PeterBale
20.02.2007, 17:09
There was a young lady from Brum,
who wanted to play a drum,
She purchased some sticks . . .
timbloke
20.02.2007, 17:10
There was a young lady from Brum,
Who wanted to play on a drum,
But with only a carrot,
D'oh, too slow again!
There was a young lady from Brum,
who wanted to play a drum,
She purchased some sticks,
And learnt juggling tricks,
bigmamabadger
20.02.2007, 17:43
And bounced the timps off her bum.
There once was a young tenor horn
Ffion Flugel
20.02.2007, 17:55
Whose band jacket got terribly torn ...
PeterBale
20.02.2007, 17:58
There once was a young tenor horn
Whose band jacket got terribly torn . . .
The buttons fell off . . .
dazzyboy
22.02.2007, 18:59
There once was a young tenor horn
Whose band jacket got terribly torn . . .
The buttons fell off . . .
Whenever she'd cough
There once was a young tenor horn. . .
Whose band jacket got terribly torn . . .
The buttons fell off . . .
Whenever she'd cough. . .
and they'd land straight on the front lawn.
There once lived a beautiful young lady . . .
bigmamabadger
22.02.2007, 21:42
Who, although decidedly shady
PeterBale
23.02.2007, 07:55
There once was a beuatiful young lady
Who, although decidedly shady,
Was given to say
At the start of each day . . .
timbloke
23.02.2007, 09:21
There once was a beuatiful young lady
Who, although decidedly shady,
Was given to say
At the start of each day,
"Not shady, I'm Savage (O'Grady)"
timbloke
23.02.2007, 09:35
(although the first line doesn't necessarily work now! Depending on your point of view)
Forgot to start the next...
In Bradford, St Georges Hall,
PeterBale
23.02.2007, 10:20
In Bradford, St Georges Hall,
Plays host to some bands great and small . . .
timbloke
23.02.2007, 10:43
In Bradford, St Georges Hall,
Plays host to some bands great and small,
From Thurcroft to Dyke...
PeterBale
23.02.2007, 11:53
In Bradford, St Georges Hall,
Plays host to some bands great and small,
From Thurcroft to Dyke...
(not Fosse but Black, like) . . .
Teflon1961
23.02.2007, 14:09
In Bradford, St Georges Hall,
Plays host to some bands great and small,
From Thurcroft to Dyke...
(not Fosse but Black, like) . . .
and everyone there gives their all
The judge, he sat in his box...
timbloke
23.02.2007, 14:14
The judge, he sat in his box,
Whilst the players hit him with rocks,
Ffion Flugel
23.02.2007, 14:47
He said he was trying
Laserbeam bass
23.02.2007, 15:03
The judge, he sat in his box,
Whilst the players hit him with rocks,
He said he was trying
Whilst certainly not prying
PeterBale
23.02.2007, 15:23
The judge, he sat in his box,
Whilst the players hit him with rocks,
He said he was trying
Whilst certainly not prying,
As his critics he pledged to outfox.
The test piece was coming on well . . .
Teflon1961
23.02.2007, 16:48
The test piece was coming on well . . .
apart from the tubular bell
The test piece was coming on well
Apart from the tubular bell
It fell with a clatter.....
PeterBale
23.02.2007, 17:35
The test piece was coming on well
Apart from the tubular bell
It fell with a clatter.....
But what did it matter? -
The test piece was coming on well
Apart from the tubular bell
It fell with a clatter
But what did it matter?
The percussionist looks pretty swell!
An anarchic trombone player called Bob....
PeterBale
23.02.2007, 18:49
An anarchic trombone player called Bob....
Was hired for an unusual job . . .
timbloke
23.02.2007, 21:53
An anarchic trombone player called Bob,
Was hired for an unusual job,
He was told to supply...
An anarchic trombone player called Bob,
Was hired for an unusual job,
He was told to supply
A king-size pork pie........
PeterBale
24.02.2007, 01:40
An anarchic trombone player called Bob,
Was hired for an unusual job,
He was told to supply
A king-size pork pie........
Which went straight away into his gob ;)
Teflon1961
26.02.2007, 12:26
New line Peter..?
:)
PeterBale
26.02.2007, 13:32
New line Peter..?
:)
Sorry :oops:
The Regionals now are upon us . . .
bigmamabadger
26.02.2007, 15:53
Sorry :oops:
The Regionals now are upon us . . .
And the demons of nerves are among us
PeterBale
26.02.2007, 16:39
The Regionals now are upon us,
And the demons of nerves are among us;
Rehearsals are fraught . . .
The Regionals now are upon us,
And the demons of nerves are among us;
Rehearsals are fraught . . .
The Regionals now are upon us,
And the demons of nerves are among us;
Rehearsals are fraught
as the music is taught....
PeterBale
26.02.2007, 18:11
The Regionals now are upon us,
And the demons of nerves are among us;
Rehearsals are fraught
As the music is taught....
Yet the errors are still quite horrendous :mad:
The conductor was saying one day . . .
The conductor was saying one day . . .
That he wished he could go far away,
bigmamabadger
26.02.2007, 19:07
The conductor was saying one day . . .
That he wished he could go far away,
So we packed up his bags
Ffion Flugel
26.02.2007, 20:57
The conductor was saying one day
That he wished he could go far away
So we packed up his bags
And all of his fags
The conductor was saying one day
That he wished he could go far away
So we packed up his bags
And all of his fags
And posted him, 3rd class, to Bombay!
A percussionist, being quite bored,
A percussionist, being quite bored,
Had delusions that he was a lord. . .
Teflon1961
27.02.2007, 00:24
The conductor was saying one day . . .
That he wished he could go far away,
So we packed up his bags
into both of his Jag's
PeterBale
27.02.2007, 10:11
A percussionist, being quite bored,
Had delusions that he was a lord. . .
He took up his sticks . . .
timbloke
27.02.2007, 10:28
Whoah... doubling up on the limericks.... I'll complete them both to avoid further confusion!
The conductor was saying one day . . .
That he wished he could go far away,
So we packed up his bags
into both of his Jag's
And replaced him with one Russell Gray.
The conductor was saying one day . . .
That he wished he could go far away,
He took up his sticks . . .
Which did magical tricks,
And turned into t'other Russell Gray. (The tall one not the short one as 4br put it)
And I guess that mean's I can start another.
Whilst predicting the contest results...
Whilst predicting the contest results
4BR received loads of insults........
bigmamabadger
27.02.2007, 15:57
Whilst predicting the contest results
4BR received loads of insults........
They swore and they cursed
Teflon1961
27.02.2007, 18:10
Whilst predicting the contest results
4BR received loads of insults........
They swore and they cursed
As results were reversed
Whilst predicting the contest results
4BR received loads of insults........
They swore and they cursed
As results were reversed
It was indeed a time of Tumults.
......There was a crazy timpanist
Ffion Flugel
03.03.2007, 08:49
......There was a crazy timpanist
Who while bashing his drum sadly missed ...
There was a crazy timpanist,
Who while bashing his drum sadly missed,
He let go of the stick..
Pops2501
03.03.2007, 10:52
There was a crazy timpanist,
Who while bashing his drum sadly missed,
He let go of the stick..
With a kind of a flick...;)
There was a crazy timpanist,
Who while bashing his drum sadly missed,
He let go of the stick
With a kind of a flick
And severely bruised his left wrist
A judge, with his whistle one day...
Ffion Flugel
03.03.2007, 15:46
A judge, with his whistle one day
Much to our dear conductor's dismay ...
A judge, with his whistle one day
Much to our dear conductor's dismay
Drowned twelve bars of the piece...
Ffion Flugel
03.03.2007, 22:19
A judge, with his whistle one day
Much to our dear conductor's dismay
Drowned twelve bars of the piece...
Whistling melodies from "Grease"
A judge, with his whistle one day
Much to our dear conductor's dismay
Drowned twelve bars of the piece...
Whistling melodies from "Grease"
And had to be carted away!
An unusual percussionist called Moz...
Ffion Flugel
03.03.2007, 23:13
An unusual percussionist called Moz
Had to take time off band lately 'cos ...
An unusual percussionist called Moz
Had to take time off band lately 'cos
Whilst dismantling his kit..
An unusual percussionist called Moz
Had to take time off band lately 'cos
Whilst dismantling his kit..
He fell in't orchestra pit
Teflon1961
04.03.2007, 01:06
An unusual percussionist called Moz
Had to take time off band lately 'cos
Whilst dismantling his kit..
He fell in't orchestra pit
and got kissed by a Cellist, called Roz..
The band bus and I were not friends...
PeterBale
04.03.2007, 09:41
The band bus and I were not friends,
Especially when going round bends . . .
Ffion Flugel
05.03.2007, 15:48
The band bus and I were not friends,
Especially when going round bends
I was drinking my pint
Teflon1961
05.03.2007, 18:06
The band bus and I were not friends,
Especially when going round bends
I was drinking my pint
and feeling defiant.. (that was hard!!!!)
"There are many words that have no rhyme in the English language. "Orange" is only the most famous. Other words that have no rhyme include:
silver, purple, month, ninth, pint, wolf,
opus, dangerous, marathon, and discombobulate!!"
Ref: http://www.flocabulary.com/rhymeswithorange.html (http://www.flocabulary.com/rhymeswithorange.html)
I can see a line ending with "discombobulate" appearing very soon....!
The band bus and I were not friends,
Especially when going round bends
I was drinking my pint
and feeling defiant..
Then knocked it all over my friends!
One contest, to add in some spice....
Teflon1961
05.03.2007, 18:49
One contest, to add in some spice....
We "fluttered" a Hymn, which was nice..
One contest, to add in some spice....
We "fluttered" a Hymn, which was nice.
Till the euph player's tongue...
Ffion Flugel
05.03.2007, 19:05
One contest, to add in some spice....
We "fluttered" a Hymn, which was nice.
Till the euph player's tongue
Went terribly wrong ...
One contest, to add in some spice....
We "fluttered" a Hymn, which was nice.
Till the euph player's tongue
Went terribly wrong
And we had to get him to suck ice
A mobile phone rang mid contest.............
trombone-john
05.03.2007, 19:14
A mobile phone rang mid contest....
The conductor on stage got quite stressed....
Ffion Flugel
05.03.2007, 19:15
A mobile phone rang mid contest
While the sop had a dozen bars' rest ...
Ffion Flugel
05.03.2007, 19:16
A mobile phone rang mid contest....
The conductor on stage got quite stressed
He waggled the stick
Teflon1961
05.03.2007, 19:18
A mobile phone rang mid contest.............
During my 20 bars rest...
trombone-john
05.03.2007, 19:20
A mobile phone rang mid contest
The conductor on stage got quite stressed
He waggled his stick
Did a conjuring trick.....
A mobile phone rang mid contest
The conductor on stage got quite stressed
He waggled his stick
Did a conjuring trick
And stripped off to Y-Fronts and vest!
While triple tonguing one day........
trombone-john
05.03.2007, 19:25
While triple tonguing one day
I got a bit carried away....
While triple tonguing one day
I got a bit carried away
I tried tu tu ku..
bigmamabadger
06.03.2007, 12:51
While triple tonguing one day
I got a bit carried away
I tried tu tu ku..
But needed the loo
Ipswich trom
06.03.2007, 15:49
While triple tonguing one day
I got a bit carried away
I tried tu tu ku
But needed the loo,
Oh, what a strange place to play.
Whilst watching the big match on Sky...
Whilst watching the big match on Sky,
I ate a great big apple pie..
Whilst watching the big match on Sky,
I ate a great big apple pie..
Then the satellite dish..
Teflon1961
07.03.2007, 18:48
Whilst watching the big match on Sky,
I ate a great big apple pie..
Then the satellite dish..
complied with my wish...
bigmamabadger
07.03.2007, 20:10
Whilst watching the big match on Sky,
I ate a great big apple pie..
Then the satellite dish..
complied with my wish...
And endded the match with a tie...:p
There once was a man called MikeLyons...
There once was a man called MikeLyons
Got charged up with negative ions...
There once was a man called MikeLyons
Got charged up with negative ions
Within half an hour
There once was a man called MikeLyons
Got charged up with negative ions
Within half an hour
He'd gained super power
Teflon1961
08.03.2007, 00:31
There once was a man called MikeLyons
Got charged up with negative ions
Within half an hour
He'd gained super power
and his very wet pants became dry 'uns!
Now..Fred, one day in the garden...
bigmamabadger
08.03.2007, 09:13
Now..Fred, one day in the garden...
Found he could play the bombardon
honey bun
08.03.2007, 16:41
Found he could play the bombardon
He huffed and he puffed
Now..Fred, one day in the garden
Found he could play the bombardon
He huffed and he puffed
And looked somewhat chuffed............
Now..Fred, one day in the garden
Found he could play the bombardon
He huffed and he puffed
And looked somewhat chuffed
He'd been told that the tuba's a hard'un!
A small tenor horn player in tights.....
A small tenor horn player in tights
While performing Verona Lights
honey bun
09.03.2007, 10:57
A small tenor horn player in tights
While performing Verona Lights
He played a bum note
A small tenor horn player in tights
While performing Verona Lights
He played a bum note
And reached for his coat.......
honey bun
09.03.2007, 11:44
A small tenor horn player in tights
While performing Verona Lights
He played a bum note
And reached for his coat.......
Then went off to play Vienna Nights!
There was an old man named George
timbloke
09.03.2007, 12:11
There was an old man named George,
Who tried marching around in Ponds Forge,
(NB Ponds Forge swimming pool hosted the World Underwater Hockey Championships last Summer, and I had the "pleasure" of marching around the very warm pool with Stannington. Trying to breathe in that air is hard enough, but when marching and playing... forget it)
There was an old man named George,
Who tried marching around in Ponds Forge,
He saw Timbloke gasping.............
honey bun
09.03.2007, 12:33
There was an old man named George,
Who tried marching around in Ponds Forge,
He saw Timbloke gasping.............
For air he was grasping
trombone-john
13.03.2007, 15:04
There was an ald man named George,
Who tried marching around in Ponds Forge,
He saw Timbloke gasping,
For air he was grasping,
Then keeled over and fell in a gorge.
There was a bagpiper called Jock...............
PeterBale
13.03.2007, 15:21
There was a bagpiper called Jock...............
Whom all the brass players did mock . . .
There was a bagpiper called Jock
Whom all the brass players did mock
So he lifted his kilt..............
bigmamabadger
13.03.2007, 16:44
There was a bagpiper called Jock
Whom all the brass players did mock
So he lifted his kilt..............
And said with a lilt
PeterBale
13.03.2007, 17:48
There was a bagpiper called Jock
Whom all the brass players did mock
So he lifted his kilt,
And said with a lilt
"Where'd you think I would put my spare sock?"
When it's "Highland Cathedral" again . . .
:grnsm at Peter's last one!
When it's "Highland Cathedral" again
You may want to go the pub then....
Magic Flute
13.03.2007, 18:54
When it's "Highland Cathedral" again
You may want to go the pub then....
With a full glass in your hand
Teflon1961
14.03.2007, 15:50
When it's "Highland Cathedral" again
You may want to go the pub then....
With a full glass in your hand
Followed by the band
PeterBale
14.03.2007, 16:26
When it's "Highland Cathedral" again
You may want to go the pub then....
With a full glass in your hand
Followed by the band
Strangle the piper - eh hen?
The band had a terrible start . . .
The band had a terrible start . . .
The band had a terrible start
The horn had forgotten his part....
Magic Flute
14.03.2007, 16:55
The band had a terrible start
The horn had forgotten his part....
So they went up on stage...
trombone-john
14.03.2007, 17:46
The band had a terrible start,
The horn had forgotten his part,
So they went up on stage,
In a terrible rage.......
bigmamabadger
14.03.2007, 18:37
The band had a terrible start,
The horn had forgotten his part,
So they went up on stage,
In a terrible rage.......
And tore the conductor apart
There once was a band went to harrogate...
Magic Flute
14.03.2007, 18:52
There once was a band went to Harrogate,
The traffic was bad so they got there late...
PeterBale
15.03.2007, 08:05
There once was a band went to Harrogate,
The traffic was bad so they got there late...
The conductor was fuming . . .
bigmamabadger
16.03.2007, 08:50
The conductor was fuming . . .
The band needed tuning
PeterBale
16.03.2007, 11:52
There once was a band went to Harrogate,
The traffic was bad so they got there late...
The conductor was fuming . . .
The band needed tuning,
It's a good job they weren't drawn 'til number eight!
Number one is a dangerous draw . . .
honey bun
16.03.2007, 12:42
Number one is a dangerous draw . . .[/quote]
It really should be against the law
PeterBale
16.03.2007, 12:49
Number one is a dangerous draw -
It really should be against the law . . .
If everything's good, . . .
Number one is a dangerous draw
It really should be against the law
But it's better by far...
(yes, the obvious one......)
bigmamabadger
16.03.2007, 15:41
Number one is a dangerous draw -
It really should be against the law . . .
If everything's good, . . .
And you play like you should
PeterBale
16.03.2007, 15:45
Number one is a dangerous draw -
It really should be against the law . . .
If everything's good, . . .
And you play like you should
The man in the box still looks for more :mad:
The tuba fell out of its case . . .
The tuba fell out of its case
And rolled to the percussionist's place
The tuba fell out of its case
And rolled to the percussionist's place
He threw down his sticks...
The tuba fell out of its case
And rolled to the percussionist's place
He threw down his sticks
amongst other antics
Teflon1961
18.03.2007, 15:05
The tuba fell out of its case
And rolled to the percussionist's place
He threw down his sticks
amongst other antics
pulled a very grimmacing face
Now Friday night, about Nine..
Now Friday night, about Nine
I'll open a bottle of wine...............
Now Friday night, about Nine
I'll open a bottle of wine
And then, around ten
Now Friday night, about Nine
I'll open a bottle of wine
And then, around ten
He listened to Wem!
Teflon1961
19.03.2007, 17:21
Now Friday night, about Nine
I'll open a bottle of wine
And then, around ten
He listened to Wem!
And went to the Chippy to dine.
Sat watching the weakest link...
Sat watching the weakest link
When I noticed a terrible stink...............
Teflon1961
20.03.2007, 00:37
Sat watching the weakest link
When I noticed a terrible stink
My valve oil had burst
PeterBale
20.03.2007, 11:32
Sat watching the weakest link
When I noticed a terrible stink
My valve oil had burst
But what was the worst:
Sat watching the weakest link
When I noticed a terrible stink
My valve oil had burst
But what was the worst
I'd nothing else left to drink!
(disclaimer, valve oil is poisonous, you should neverdrink it, etc........)
The auditorium was deathly hushed........
PeterBale
20.03.2007, 13:26
The auditorium was deathly hushed........
The audience about to be crushed . . .
The auditorium was deathly hushed
The audience about to be crushed
The ceiling caved in...............
Ipswich trom
20.03.2007, 14:37
The auditorium was deathly hushed
The audience about to be crushed
The ceiling caved in
So I grabbed my Gin.......
honey bun
20.03.2007, 15:51
The auditorium was deathly hushed
The audience about to be crushed
The ceiling caved in
So I grabbed my Gin.......
Now I don't care if I'm mushed!!
Now that the areas are over.........
Ipswich trom
20.03.2007, 16:00
Now that the areas are over
And Cambridge's Sop is again sober.......
honey bun
20.03.2007, 16:26
Now that the areas are over
And Cambridge's Sop is again sober.......
(Ha) The bar he was in.....
PeterBale
20.03.2007, 17:55
Now that the areas are over
And Cambridge's Sop is again sober.......
The bar he was in.....
Has been cleaned up ag'in . . .
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