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Thirteen Ball
12.12.2005, 15:02
I helped a band out on saturday night. Nice bunch, at first glance, but they had a dark, depraved and shameful side.

They made me play "Is this the way to Amarillo"

How can I ever look my bandmates in the eye again? I am unclean!!!!

Will the Sec
12.12.2005, 15:11
You wouldn't feel like that if you had a decent arrangement...

Regretably, the only decent arrangement is only available for the Fulham Band...:rolleyes:

Tom-King
12.12.2005, 16:08
i know the feeling exactly...

Thirteen Ball
12.12.2005, 16:16
i know the feeling exactly...


Wretched isn't it? Is there any cure for Tonius Chrititis or am I marked for life?

Give it to me straight, doc....

Tom-King
12.12.2005, 16:22
we need some serious help!!!!

pleeeeeeeeeeeease! help us!

... i have an idea... if everyone renamed it (like they do with macbeth) then the bad luck might go away... 13 - we didnt play <mumbles> its now called (umm) - ill let you think of some ideas for what to call it :p

2nd man down
12.12.2005, 16:32
Ha ha...we borrowed Rambo Chick and had her playing Reindeer Express!! Now that cheese just stinks of gorgonzola!!

Thirteen Ball
12.12.2005, 16:43
Ha ha...we borrowed Rambo Chick and had her playing Reindeer Express!!

That's cheered me up, I'll see her at practice tonight!

As for renaming it, that's a good idea! Not sure what to call it though. Just seen new Harry potter film, so how about "The fourth unforgiveable curse?" And forget Voldemort, Tony Christie is now "He who must not be named!"

Oh hang on, that last one's already taken.... by Frank Bernaerts.

Tom-King
12.12.2005, 16:46
Aahhahahaha

"the fourth unforgiveable curse"... hmmm that might work
tony christie could be... forgotten :D lets just forget he exists :p

as for the arrangers - that should be changed on paper - for their own personal safety ;)

Thirteen Ball
12.12.2005, 16:56
...as for the arrangers - that should be changed on paper - for their own personal safety ;)

With profuse apologies to Mr Will who replied above, of course!! ;)

"The Fourth Unforgiveable Curse" it is then. Not even Voldemort would stoop so low as to use that one!

Should we write to Kofi Annan and propose an amendment to the geneva convention? Or do you think it's already covered under the torture and humiliation laws?

Tom-King
12.12.2005, 16:59
im not sure... itd certainly count as torture for me...
of course! apologies to mr will.. im sure his is a good arrangement (but the piece was rubbish in the first place ;))

actually - i feel that will deserves a medal, for bravery, to arrange that for brass band people

Will the Sec
12.12.2005, 17:34
With profuse apologies to Mr Will who replied above, of course!! ;)

One of the advanytages of being an arranger who is 6 ft 4, about 18 stone and with an attitude problem is that few people actually argue with me about the quality of my arrangements...

Thirteen Ball
12.12.2005, 17:35
actually - i feel that will deserves a medal, for bravery, to arrange that for brass band people

Good shout!

I understand that in military situations (Iraq for example) the US army play heavy metal records at the enemy to wilt their spirits and stop them sleeping.

Not just heavy metal though, allsorts of records. In fact, I seem to remember that "Teletubbies say Eh-Oh!" was on the playlist as well! Combine the teletubbies with our "4th unforgiveable sin" and resistance would surely crumble overnight!

But the DJ would probably be indicted for war crimes....

Thirteen Ball
12.12.2005, 17:38
One of the advanytages of being an arranger who is 6 ft 4, about 18 stone and with an attitude problem is that few people actually argue with me about the quality of my arrangements...

:shock:

Eeek!

Being 5ft11 and rather trim (For a bass player) I'll certainly defer!

Now where did I put my running shoes.....?

PeterBale
12.12.2005, 17:50
:shock:

Eeek!

Being 5ft11 and rather trim (For a bass player) I'll certainly defer!

Now where did I put my running shoes.....?

Bass player . . . run . . . something wrong there ;)

Will the Sec
12.12.2005, 18:09
Bass player . . . run . . . something wrong there ;)

Isn't that what we classify marching as?:rolleyes:

Thirteen Ball
12.12.2005, 18:10
Bass player . . . run . . . something wrong there ;)

Well as long as it's a quaver run I'm alright. Although semiquavers might make me struggle a bit though.... :oops:

Our other BB is the fastest man in the band.... When they ring last orders!

Will the Sec
12.12.2005, 18:17
actually - i feel that Will deserves a medal, for bravery, to arrange that for brass band people

Actually it was a request from within the band. And given who it was from, replete with her ability to employ puppy dog eyes and show off some very long legs, it wasn't difficult to agree.

What's really sad about most arrangements of Amarillo is that most arrangers clearly haven't listened to the record.

OK, you'll always get minor differences in the melody due to use of vocal inflections difficult to reproduce on brass instruments, but the percussion parts should be reproduced note for note. For example - if the snare isn't written on EVERY beat of the piece, as it is in the original and recent Christie recordings, then the piece loses all its urgency and liveliness. Equally, the gorgeous trombone counter melody in the second verse is essential for variety in my mind, but the three other arrangements I've heard omit this or mutilate it.

Oy vay. Who'd be an arranger? :confused:

Tom-King
12.12.2005, 18:20
who did the other arragements of the 4th unforgiveable curse then?

Will the Sec
12.12.2005, 18:28
Discretion and the threat of legal action prevents me from naming anyone - but you've already mentioned one...

trumpetmike
12.12.2005, 18:34
One of the advanytages of being an arranger who is 6 ft 4, about 18 stone and with an attitude problem is that few people actually argue with me about the quality of my arrangements...
Having not heard your arrangement I am, of course, in no position to criticise it - however, I would venture to suggest that in this case it is not the quality of the arrangement that is in question - it is the piece that has been arranged - if you are given a pile of excrement, you will never be able to produce a diamond bracelet.
I am sure that you have shined it well though;)

Will the Sec
12.12.2005, 18:55
Having not heard your arrangement I am, of course, in no position to criticise it - however, I would venture to suggest that in this case it is not the quality of the arrangement that is in question - it is the piece that has been arranged - if you are given a pile of excrement, you will never be able to produce a diamond bracelet.
I am sure that you have shined it well though;)

With rhubarb....

Trust me on this, Mike. Listen to some of the arrangements, and you'd not dream of putting mine in there with them. The reason mine wasn;t out as quick as some others was that I did take some time over it.

Anyway, I like to think that 150 plus people on Hampstead Heath, the Sunday after the bombs, all getting up and doing the Peter Kay walk as the band played and I hammed up the conducting, mean my arrangement was good enough for the purpose. :rolleyes:

Thirteen Ball
13.12.2005, 11:11
Discretion and the threat of legal action prevents me from naming anyone - but you've already mentioned one...

That'll be "he who must not be named" then. The greatest alliance of Evil since the two towers in lord of the rings!

rutty
13.12.2005, 11:51
Having not heard your arrangement I am, of course, in no position to criticise it - however, I would venture to suggest that in this case it is not the quality of the arrangement that is in question - it is the piece that has been arranged - if you are given a pile of excrement, you will never be able to produce a diamond bracelet.
I am sure that you have shined it well though;)

I think the phrase you're looking for is "you can't polish a turd" :cool:

Thirteen Ball
13.12.2005, 12:59
I think the phrase you're looking for is "you can't polish a turd" :cool:

Bit crude but certainly right on the money!

B'aht a band
14.12.2005, 00:25
Our other BB is the fastest man in the band.... When they ring last orders!

Aah, I remember when that was me.... getting to the bar before the first chimes of the last orders bell went. Looks like all my mantle's have finally been passed on........ :frown:

Andy, sat in his rocking chair, remembering the good old days

Thirteen Ball
14.12.2005, 16:22
Aah, I remember when that was me.... getting to the bar before the first chimes of the last orders bell went. Looks like all my mantle's have finally been passed on........ :frown:

Andy, sat in his rocking chair, remembering the good old days

You're getting old talking like that mate!

Yeah, new lad might not be able to count (Hi Rich!) but he can sure hear a last orders bell! ;)

Nigel Hall
14.12.2005, 17:41
You wouldn't feel like that if you had a decent arrangement...

Regretably, the only decent arrangement is only available for the Fulham Band...:rolleyes:

I'm sorry Mr Elsom but I beg to differ - mine is the only decent arrangement!! and like yours is not available for sale.

persins
14.12.2005, 18:05
Anyway, I like to think that 150 plus people on Hampstead Heath, the Sunday after the bombs, all getting up and doing the Peter Kay walk as the band played and I hammed up the conducting, mean my arrangement was good enough for the purpose. :rolleyes:

Or perhaps, as suggested, the audience was put under some curse that made them do it?!!!

Will the Sec
14.12.2005, 18:45
I'm sorry Mr Elsom but I beg to differ - mine is the only decent arrangement!! and like yours is not available for sale.

Ah, Nigel. I would clarify. " Regretably, the only decent arrangement I've heard is only available for the Fulham Band..."...

Thirteen Ball
14.12.2005, 18:52
Or perhaps, as suggested, the audience was put under some curse that made them do it?!!!

That's the 1st unforgiveable curse, (the curse of control) in action. Combining two curses like that is nothing short of fiendish! Will Christie stop at nothing?! :eek:

midlandbass
14.12.2005, 21:44
I helped a band out on saturday night. Nice bunch, at first glance, but they had a dark, depraved and shameful side.

They made me play "Is this the way to Amarillo"

How can I ever look my bandmates in the eye again? I am unclean!!!!

Good job you weren't at our wedding - we walked back down the aisle to it - should have seen the faces on the whole audience. Think the band had a good laugh too!!

Charmed
15.12.2005, 20:52
Must admit to never having heard this played by a brass band. However, I do think it is one of those pieces that the audience will love and the band hate playing.

Thirteen Ball
16.12.2005, 13:12
Must admit to never having heard this played by a brass band. However, I do think it is one of those pieces that the audience will love and the band hate playing.

That's right on the button. Has no redeeming features whatsoever for band or conductor (In the arrangement I played anyway) but for some reason the audience loves it.

The strange phenomenom sometimes referred to as "The Floral Dance Effect."

LeDragon
16.12.2005, 19:19
I'm depping with Buckley Band tonight and my Dad has just shown me the program that they're playing - guess what's on it..............yep, Amarillo!! I've never had the dubious pleasure of playing it before and I can't say that I'm looking forward to it!!

Rapier
17.12.2005, 10:23
That's right on the button. Has no redeeming features whatsoever for band or conductor (In the arrangement I played anyway) but for some reason the audience loves it.

The strange phenomenom sometimes referred to as "The Floral Dance Effect."

Absolutely!! We played a carol concert at a Day Care Centre for Downs syndrome sufferers the other week. To the bands amazement I suggested Amarillo (as it's in the pad from summer jobs still) They loved it! We had to play it 3 times.

persins
20.12.2005, 18:19
I played an arrangement of it with Bournemouth Concert Brass during the pinewalk bandstand gig. The sop and principal cornet players decided to have a high note competition on one of the long note chords. The Solo Cornet player hit a peach of a note and was looking all smug until he felt something in his ears. It was just on the edge of human hearing but definitely there. It took a while before he realised what it was and then finally realised it was James Cooper!!!

As one of my mates said, "the only proof that the note actually existed was the golden retreaver savaging its owner about a mile away!"

It was the only thing that made playing the piece amusing!