what's the worst/funniest self-inflicted injury that you've had?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by scotchgirl, Dec 15, 2008.

  1. scotchgirl

    scotchgirl Active Member

    I was once trying to get rid of a slightly iffy atmosphere in my house (two friends were having a wee tiff), so decided to try and lighten the mood by showing them a trick I'd learned how to do whilst drunk the week before.......

    It was just kicking up my feet together at the side....like on a dodgy musical or something lol!

    Well, instead of doing that, I did a stupid kick up in the air with both feet and landed on the side of my ankle....which resulted in 6 hours in casualty, to find out I'd displaced the cartilage in my ankle and sprained 3 ligaments in my foot!!

    Oh how we laughed........;)
  2. Hells Bones

    Hells Bones Active Member

    I've got a couple of funny ones but they aint exactly self inflicted...

    Unlike the time I tried to eat a double burger in a pub and dislocated my jaw...

    Damn thing cracks now
  3. David Mann

    David Mann Member

    Tried to jump across a lock on a canal holiday and didn't make it, ended up with bruised ribs. The pain was made worse by everyone else killing themselves laughing.
  4. StellaJohnson

    StellaJohnson Active Member

    At a friends a few weeks ago in sheffield, went to the room i was staying, didn't see the small step. I trip over and landed on the blanket box It killed and I thought i got away it, no bruise, thats until I got home!!

    Never broken anything in my life!
  5. ploughboy

    ploughboy Active Member

    Pulled a neck muscle drying my hair!
  6. JesTperfect!

    JesTperfect! Member

    Stood up to wave goodbye to a friend as they got off the train and sat back down to a painful reminder that I had a flip up seat (like you get in the cinema).

    Laughed along with everyone else (although secretly wanted to cry). DID cry when a the friend opposite me pointed at my T Shirt in horror and said 'why is there red on your shoulder?'.

    Held up the train for 55 mins and even got taken to hospital in an ambulance :)

    Where I soaked 2 pillows with my blood. They glued it back together . . . thankfully no lasting damage was done!
  7. leisa

    leisa Active Member

    My very first rehearsal with Grange Moor....our band room is in a field, my lovely boyfriend dropped me off as I didn't have a clue where I was going I got out of the car slipped in mud landing on my rear end and reeeeally hurting my ankle. Was quite embaressing turning up to my first rehearsal with mud all over my backside! Nearly 8 months on I still have problems with my ankle :-(
  8. leisa

    leisa Active Member

    You have no hair :confused:
  9. Chunky

    Chunky Active Member

    Only a few weeks ago, whilst suffering with the old chesticles, I coughed so hard whilst bending over I cracked 2 ribs and tore muscles around the rib-cage. The tear also produced a bruise the size of a small county!
  10. bbg

    bbg Member

    A few years back, played a few games of 5-a-side football after many years without regular exercise - extremely tired (!) towards the end of a game, still tried a fancy drag-back on the run (well, stumble), tripped over the bright yellow ball and thought I'd hurt my hand. Only after trying to drive next day did I head for A&E - result: one broken wrist , in plaster for 6 weeks.

    Have not been near a 5-a-side court since, and at my age not likely to ever again in any case.
  11. Thirteen Ball

    Thirteen Ball Active Member

    I knocked myself unconscious with a penalty kick once.

    1-1, 68th minute, hammered it high and hard, knowing the keeper would dive to one side, which he duly did. Unfortunately I hit the crossbar smack on the button, and the ball rebounded and smashed me square in the face.

    I woke up fifteen minutes later on the touchline, with paramedics all around and concussion. Apparently my head hit the floor with a hell of a bang, which is what put me out for so long. (Some would say it had a permanent effect on me too ;) )

    The worst part was hearing that the ball had rebounded off my head, and straight into the opposite bottom corner of the net to where yon keeper had hurled himself. However since another player had not touched the ball in-between the two contacts it'd had with me, the ref had quite correctly disallowed the goal, and we were now losing 2-1!

    I never did live that one down. I suppose it's my own fault for accepting the number 13 shirt. (Though that isn't where the username comes from although it's not a million miles away....)
  12. scotchgirl

    scotchgirl Active Member

    I have also this year, managed to break the middle finger of my right hand, 2 hours before playing in the Grand Shield!

    I jammed it in a door, wasn't even drunk! lol! Managed to play, with the aid of paracetamol, and had it strapped up as soon as we finished....the drink helped with the pain afterwards. I did refuse to go to A&E though - can you imagine it? A&E, Saturday night in Blackpool? I don't think so lol!
  13. towse1972

    towse1972 Active Member

    Scotch! You are a quality bander! hero..... :clap:
  14. scotchgirl

    scotchgirl Active Member


    ROBTHEDOG Member

    Just this morning setting a rat trap in the cellar --- sensitive trap OUCH my thumb hurts ....

    However worst was falling out of a tree with a chainsaw and landing on my back !!!
  16. ian perks

    ian perks Active Member

    15 years ago i ruptured my achilles tendon while playing badminton i was off work for 14 weeks:mad: but i was a member of Warwickshire Cricket Club and i ruptured it in the middle of the cricket season so i saw loads of cricket that year:clap:
  17. Bayerd

    Bayerd Active Member

    That'll be the 'sitting on the branch I'm sawing off' error then......:biggrin:
  18. hicks

    hicks Member

    Reminds me of a neighbour I once saw attempting to hack bits of a tree in his garden, with a chainsaw, perched precariously on a chair. I thought at the time it was a Darwin award waiting to happen. Fortunately he survived.
  19. scotchgirl

    scotchgirl Active Member

    At Pontins a few years ago (pre-children thankfully lol!) my husband and I were really really worse for wear, at about 4am, after drinking solidly for most of the day.

    As we were walking back to our luxury (cheapo) chalet, husband stumbles, runs a bit, stumbles, runs a bit, stumbles in a whole 'is he gonna fall, or isn't he?' routine.....and eventually tips right over onto his face.

    The rest of us stare at him open-mouthed, then burst out laughing....very funny....that is until the next day, when we're due to play, and hubby has ripped a muscle in his shoulder (he's a percussionist)....

    I had to change gear for him the whole way back to the Midlands, and he then had to have physio for 6 weeks....so the moral is - don't go to Pontins ;) hee hee
  20. WoodenFlugel

    WoodenFlugel Moderator Staff Member

    I can think of much, much worse things you can land on in that situation :eek:

    My worst was probably when I was a mere slip of a lad watching Leicester Tigers. I say "watching" - me and my mate were actually messing around in the tunnel under one of the stands. We were playing tag or something and while he was running after me his legs got tangled up in mine tripping me up. Any normal person would've landed with their hands palm down, but I didn't - I landed on the back of my right hand. I must've had some momentum from running because as I slid along the concrete surface I managed to remove the nails from 3 of my fingers, break my middle finger and skin most of my index finger. Ouch.

    You can still see the scarring on the nail bed of my middle finger when its cold, and I also have problems with joint pain and stiffness in my right hand if my hands are cold.

    More recently - at Pontins (I thought that phrase would turn up much more often in this thread!) a couple of years ago - tripping over while absolutely ****holed and badly spraining my ankle. I had to spend the rest of the weekend (including playing for the tMP band), and much of the week after hobbling around like a broken racehorse.

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