Things you'll probably only ever do once (unless your very unlucky)

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by 2nd man down, Feb 9, 2006.

  1. 2nd man down

    2nd man down Moderator Staff Member

    1. Stare at a skinhead.
    2. Use hairspray instead of deoderant.
    3. Forget to check there's enough loo roll.
    4. Take Alka-Selzer without water.
    5. Bath a cat.
    6. Look down a garden hose when asked to.
    7. Test to see if your stapler has staples in it by pressing it on your thumb.
    8. Zip up before you've put 'it' away fully.
    9. Tuck your skirt in your knickers.
    10. Rub your eyes after chopping Chilli's.
     
  2. TheMusicMan

    TheMusicMan tMP Founder Staff Member

    Use Deep heat thinking it can be used as a deoderant... ask my lad - he did it.... :):)
     
  3. DaveR

    DaveR Active Member

    Use anusol instead of toothpaste
     
  4. dyl

    dyl Active Member

    I'm a little concerned that you'd do that once Crawford, let alone no more than once! :eek:

    A bit of a weird combination #8 & #9 don't you think, unless you're Pete Burns of course.
     
  5. tinytimp

    tinytimp Member

    Wearing a skirt while playing timps...not one I intend repeating :oops:
     
  6. Cornishwomble

    Cornishwomble Active Member

    What's wrong with these, I enjoy doing these ones :biggrin::tup
     
  7. Nanny Ogg

    Nanny Ogg Member

    Do a somersault on a trampoline and land legs split (akimbo) over the metal bars going around the trampoline rather than on the canvass.

    Still brings a tear to old Nanny's eyes now.:eek:
     
  8. Cornishwomble

    Cornishwomble Active Member

    Actually going to the toilet without washing your hands after chopping chillis is worse :frown:
     
  9. Bryan_sop

    Bryan_sop Active Member

    There were some interesting photo's taken from behind the outdoor stage at the Amboise contest one year of a young French lass wearing a partiularly small skirt playing timps.......and I missed it :mad: :mad:
     
  10. bigmamabadger

    bigmamabadger Active Member

    Use liquid soap instead of mouthwash. Don't ask.
    BMB
    xx
     
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  12. TheMusicMan

    TheMusicMan tMP Founder Staff Member

    Sorry, have to. Please elaborate...:biggrin:
     
  13. Roger Thorne

    Roger Thorne Active Member

    Die!

    ;)
     
  14. bigmamabadger

    bigmamabadger Active Member

    Bottle of red mouthwash, bottle of red liquid antibacterial soap, sat next to each other on the bathroom windowsill. Accident waiting to happen really...was blowing bubbles for ages.
    BMB
    xx
     
  15. mad_female

    mad_female Member

    Many many years ago my dad managed to clean his teeth with deep heat......silly boy forgot to check which tube he'd picked out of the sponge bag ........my mum says it couldn't have happened to a nicer person, and yes they are now divorced lol
     
  16. julestools

    julestools Active Member

    Been there. Done that. :frown:

    Also Deep Heat before the bathroom. Not a good idea .:frown: Never again.

    xx

    Jules
     
  17. Di

    Di Active Member

    Rub shampoo into blistering sunburn instead of aftersun (yes he did do that to my back!) :eek::mad: and yes, we are still married! :)
     
  18. flower girl

    flower girl Member

    use deep heat and then rub your eyes before wahing your hands :mad:
     
  19. Dave Payn

    Dave Payn Active Member

    Put a red hot iron to your ear when the telephone rings.

    Inadvertently poke yourself in the eye with a Christmas tree branch (been there, done that.... ouch!)

    Let out a fortissmo fart during a quiet bit in a concert (I HAVEN'T done that..... but I seem to recall MRSH regaling tMPers with a tale of someone actually doing so...)
     
    Last edited: Feb 10, 2006
  20. julestools

    julestools Active Member

    Ride a motorcycle into the side of a car. I obviously did not learn after the first attempt on 3rd Feb 1981 (on the way home from church, honest) :frown:

    xx

    Jules (not got a good leg to stand on now)
     
  21. Steve

    Steve Active Member

    Get drunk enough to sign for a band on Eb bass, waking up the next morning with the part in your hand and realising what you have done
     
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