Sporting Auctions - What people want to sell

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by stephen_clapton, Dec 1, 2004.

  1. stephen_clapton

    stephen_clapton New Member

    Just found this on the BBC Sport site as well........

    Tim Henman's greatest moments video (aka blank VHS tape)
    Ian Davies, UK

    Rotherham United
    Joe Cooper, England

    One chairman. Very worn, repeats itself a lot, has short arms and long pockets. Skin is old and very, very thick. Likes to get its own way. Answers to the name of Doug. Warning: Can be deadly.
    Mark Daniels, England

    Unwanted and previously thought extinct - 'Racism in English football'. Believed to be the offspring of its disgraceful Spanish cousin. Plus a set of blinkers. Must go to bidder willing to destroy them both utterly, preferably by weapons of mass education.
    Ganth, England

    Blackburn Rovers defending. Cheap enough for any (old) Division Two side. Payment required in form of a barn door for Jon Stead; the bigger the better.
    Simon Hanzl, England

    Darren Clarke's cigars. High quality, single use. Does not include alcohol. Best before: Ryder Cup after-party
    Stampy, Great Britain

    Tottenham Hotspur. Sleeping minnow waiting to be awoken from deep sleep. Offers in excess of £1 will not be taken seriously!
    GZ, UK

    I'd sell Robbie Savage's used empty shampoo/conditioner bottles. I'd make so much money! I'd have over a million to sell.
    Yes, I am a bitter Villa fan.
    Ricky Sanders, England

    The blades of grass that continue to trip up Heskey. Perfect condition.
    Liam Mason, England

    Sven Goran Eriksson. For crimes against football not seen since the dark days of Wimbledon's long ball football
    Q2thaz, England

    I'd like to put Barsnley boss Paul Hart in the auction with a reserve of me paying the winning bidder whatever he has bid.
    Rob Francis, England

    President Mugabe's invitation to the England and Wales Cricket Board's Christmas party
    Chris Norris, England

    Diego Forlan's wig
    Jon Warren, England

    My girlfriend. Least that way I wouldn't have anyone moaning at me every time I watch the football on TV
    Matt Teague, England

    Scunthorpe United fan club transport for sale. Hardly-used tandem in good condition
    stampy, great britain

    Tiger Woods' shaky, sulky bottom lip at the Ryder Cup - or at any event for that matter!
    Chris, England

    Jonathan Agnew's Harare hotel reservation
    Jon Scaife, England


    Jose Mourinho's ego. In perfect, tip-top,mint condition (according to owner) Buyer must have lots and lots of space to put it....
    Nick Goodey, USA

    FA and League Cups. 2 for 1. Worn out old tin no longer needed or wanted. Could easily be melted down and made into one large trophy, or ashtray. These once sought after prizes were the pinnacle of achievement, but are now just a chance for clubs from the lower leagues to have a shot at the Premiership's reserve sides. Europe beckons for the winner...
    Bill, UK

    Djibril Cisse's medical bill
    Mark Grehan, Ireland

    Arsene Wenger's eyes. Fairly good condition but a tendency to black out at key moments. Linked to a good brain but bad eyesight.
    Donlad Harper, England
  2. Will the Sec

    Will the Sec Active Member

    Alan Pardew's tenure at West Ham.

    "I can't criticise my players after coming back from 2-0 down to win."

    What? What about that they WENT 2-0 in the first half an hour? I'd be pretty critical of that...
  3. super_sop

    super_sop Supporting Member

    lmao these are so good! particularly liked the heskey one!
  4. stephen_clapton

    stephen_clapton New Member

    Im still looking for some Everton ones as well...... ;)

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