Responsible Use of Vodka... well, sort of...

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by lynchie, Feb 24, 2004.

  1. lynchie

    lynchie Active Member

    South London
    Vodka - Who Woulda Thunk It??

    1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage
    with vodka. The solvent dissolves the adhesive.

    2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers,
    fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking,
    let set 5 minutes and wash clean. The alcohol in the vodka
    kills mold and mildew.

    3. To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a
    soft, clean cloth dampened with vodka. The alcohol in the
    vodka cleans the glass and kills germs.

    4. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and
    letting your safety razor blade soak in the alcohol after
    shaving. The vodka disinfects the blade and prevents rusting.

    5. Spray vodka on vomit stains, scrub with a brush,
    then blot dry.

    6. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an
    astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten pores.

    7. Add a splash of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo.
    The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair
    and stimulates the growth of healthy hair.

    8. Fill a 16-ounce trigger-spray bottle and spray
    bees or wasps to kill them.

    9. Pour 1/2 cup vodka and 1/2 cup water in a freezer bag
    and freeze for a slushy, reusable ice pack for aches,
    pain or black eyes...

    10. Fill a clean, empty jar with freshly packed lavender
    flowers. Fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly, and
    set it in the sun for 3 days. Strain liquid, then apply the
    tincture to aches and pains.

    11. Make your own mouthwas by mixing 9 tablespoons
    powered cinnamon with 1 cup vodka. Seal in an airtight
    container for 2 weeks. Strain through a coffee filter. Mix
    with warm water and rinse your mouth. (DON'T SWALLOW!)

    12. Using a cotton swab, apply vodka to a cold sore to
    help it dry out.

    13. If blister opens, pour vodka over the raw skin as a
    local anestheic that also disinfects the exposed dermis.

    14. To treat dandruff, mix 1 cup vodka with 2 teaspoons
    crushed rosemary. Let sit 2 days, strain through a coffee
    filter, massage into your scalp and dry.

    15. To treat an earache, put a few drops of vodka in your
    ear. Let sit for a few minutes, then drain. Vodka will kill
    the bacteria causing pain in your ear.

    16. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka
    on your chest and back as a liniment.

    17. To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka.

    18. Vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting.

    19. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to
    remove the urushiol oil from your skin.

    20. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. Allow your
    gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain.

    And, my personal favorite...

    21. If all else fails, just turn the bottle upside-down
    and drink it. Then nothing else will matter anyway!
  2. Jo Elson

    Jo Elson Member

    That seems like a waste of a lot of vodka.
    It is also very good for cleaning floors cos a wine carrier broke and the bottle of vodka smashed the floor is now prestene white where the vodka went. Very expensive cleaning product though!
  3. Big Twigge

    Big Twigge Active Member

    can see how most of those word work. However, not sure about putting it in my ear :shock: :shock:
  4. Backrow BB

    Backrow BB New Member

    West Midlands
    All seems such a waste of the beautiful drink!!

    I have a cheaper alternative!!

    Read below the interesting facts about lovely coke!!! Think i may have to lay off drinking so much of the stuff!

    In many states (in the USA) the highway patrol carries two gallons of Cola in the boot to remove blood from the highway after a car accident

    You can put a T-bone steak in a bowl of cola and it will be gone in two days

    To clean a toilet: Pour a can of Cola into the toilet bowl and let the "real thing" sit for one hour, then flush clean. The citric acid in Cola removes stains from vitreous china

    To remove rust spots from chrome car bumpers: Rub the bumper with a rumpled up piece of Reynolds Wrap aluminium foil dipped in Cola

    To clean corrosion from car battery terminals: Pour a can of Cola over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion

    To loosen a rusted bolt: Applying a cloth soaked in Cola to the rusted bolt for several minutes

    To bake a moist ham. Empty a can of Cola into the baking pan, wrap the ham in aluminium foil, and bake. Thirty minutes before the ham is finished, remove the foil, allowing the drippings to mix with the Cola for a sumptuous brown gravy.

    To remove grease from clothes: Empty a can of Cola into a load of greasy clothes, and detergent, and run through a regular cycle. The Cola will help loosen grease stains. It will also clean road haze from your windshield.

    The active ingredient in Cola is phosphoric acid. Its pH is 2.8. It will dissolve a nail in about four days. Phosphoric acid also leaches Calcium from bones and is a major contributor to the rising increase in osteoporosis.

    To carry Cola syrup (the concentrate) the commercial truck must use the Hazardous Material place cards reserved for highly corrosive materials.

    The distributors of Cola have been using it to clean the engines of their trucks for about 20 years!
  5. bruceg

    bruceg Active Member

    Kirkcaldy (Kir-kaw-day), Fife
    Particularly irresponsible use of vodka:

    Remove shoes and socks. Soak cotton wool balls in vodka. Place soaked cotton wool between toes, lie back and get nicely drunk. Refresh cotton wool with more vodka as required.

    This top tip brought to you thanks to an Icelandic oilworker I used to work beside ;)
  6. amgray

    amgray Member

    Any volunteers to try this out??

    Not quite as weird as the South American(??) archaological evidence, pointing to the use of tubes, alcoholic liquid and a certain type of 'irrigation' favoured by some as a detox :shock: :shock: :shock:
  7. bruceg

    bruceg Active Member

    Kirkcaldy (Kir-kaw-day), Fife
    Used to be a favourite with Edinburgh medical students apparently. Take one bottle of beer (or champagne), shake well and off you go :) Bowel lining is ultra absorbant so it, allegedly, is really fast acting :D

    Toes sound less messy...
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