Poetry

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by frisp, Oct 27, 2003.

  1. frisp

    frisp Member

    Recently the BBC ran a 'Limerick Challenge' (thx Skins for the heads up), recognising the limerick as part of National Poetry Day.

    As a sad limericker, who has contended himself with lurking recently (a bit Dickensian I know), I thought a Tmp version might be in order:-

    Supply the next four lines to any one of the following please :-

    A Bass Player stood and he said,

    The MD he frowned and he swore,

    A young man who's called Roger Thorne,

    There once was a young man in Goa,

    Forgive me implored the sop cornet,
     
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  3. frisp

    frisp Member

    I'll try :-

    Forgive me implored the sop sornet
    I blew far too hard and I've torn it
    My insides are out
    Folks point and they shout
    My shame is quite hard but I've borne it!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  4. frisp

    frisp Member

    A Bass player stood and he said
    I've blown the top off my head
    We're expected I know
    To give a huge blow
    But it's robins are meant to be red..
     
  5. frisp

    frisp Member

    There once was a young man in Goa
    Whose wife had a pink feather boa
    She left him quite smart
    She seemed a young tart
    She whores in Hawaii, aloha!!!!


    :p :p :p
     
  6. frisp

    frisp Member

    The MD he frowned and he swore
    These cornets are just such a bore
    He had a quick fit
    And looked fresh at it
    Lets bring the back row to the fore!!
     
  7. lynchie

    lynchie Active Member

    A young man who's called Roger Thorne,
    Was musical when he was born,
    His back mum would pat
    And he'd burp a B flat
    And then fart a concerto for horn.
     
  8. PeterBale

    PeterBale Moderator Staff Member

    A bass player stood and he said
    "I think that my partner is dead;
    He first saw the flavours
    Of those semiquavers -
    Then decided he'd conk out instead".


    The MD he frowned and he swore
    As he glanced down and looked at the score:
    "You're playing it wrong -
    The notes are too long -
    I'll just have to show you the door.

    A young (?) man who's called Roger Thorne
    Wrote music from dusk until dawn.
    When asked why he did so
    He danced a calypso
    Then arranged it for flugel and horn.

    There once was a young man in Goa
    Who called all his friends on the blower:
    He said "How's yer doing,
    Is anything brewing?"
    Then blew up - just like Krakatoa.

    "Forgive me" implored the sop cornet,
    "I think I've just swallowed a hornet!
    It went down my throat,
    I can't play a note,
    I might as well just go and pawn it."
     
  9. Dave Payn

    Dave Payn Active Member

    The MD he frowned and he swore
    'I can't ******* take any more!'
    You play your brass
    Like it comes out your ****
    And your tuning's just so bleedin' poor!

    Edit: Please keep it clean. Dyl. :wink:
     
  10. Dave Payn

    Dave Payn Active Member

    10 out of 10 and then some! :lol:
     
  11. lynchie

    lynchie Active Member

    I thank you! I put it down to years of intensive training, and a twisted personality...
     
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  13. frisp

    frisp Member

    Brill, lynchie! :p :p :p

    The MD he frowned and he swore
    ..but chuckled a little bit more
    He laughed at the horns
    Gave up with tromborns
    Told cornets to blow like a whore!
     
  14. frisp

    frisp Member

    There once was a young man in Goa
    His Hawaiin wife said "aloha"
    He gave a small sigh
    While eating a pie
    And confessed that his real name was Noah :oops:
     
  15. PeterBale

    PeterBale Moderator Staff Member

    The MD he frowned and he swore
    That he meant to conduct it in four,
    But the band went too fast
    And the moment was past,
    So it's one in a bar like the score.
     
  16. Dave Payn

    Dave Payn Active Member

    [
    Edit: Please keep it clean. Dyl. :wink:[/quote]

    Apologies, Dyl. I was taking the 'swore' element perhaps a little too literally!
     
  17. PeterBale

    PeterBale Moderator Staff Member

    A young man who's called Roger Thorne
    Discovered his trousers had gorn -
    He still kept his hat on
    And wiggled his baton
    Looking just like the day he was born.
     
  18. lynchie

    lynchie Active Member

    A Bass Player stood and he said,
    "I want to play tuba instead,
    The tuba at best
    Gets 100 bars rest
    So I get one more hour in bed"
     
  19. PeterBale

    PeterBale Moderator Staff Member

    A bass player stood up and said
    "I'm fed up of earning no bread".
    He got on the 'phone
    And bought a trombone,
    So now he goes gigging instead.
     

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