Playing out of tune ...........

Discussion in 'The Rehearsal Room' started by ploughboy, Mar 13, 2006.

  1. ploughboy

    ploughboy Active Member

    What's the best excuse you've ever heard for playing out of tune . . . either rank bad tuning or just a little off key . . . .

    here's a new one on me ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

    "the band play out of tune because the MD sings to us out of tune, and we're so good at listening we're thrown off key"

    Honestly i'm rolling in the isle's
  2. brassneck

    brassneck Active Member

    Years ago I remember one player arguing that he was in tune with the LP recording he was playing along with therefore the band must have been out of tune! D'oh!
  3. Straightmute

    Straightmute Active Member

    I can fix you up with singing lessons Garry. For the price of a pint I can give you the number of a lady who would have you singing like a lark. Today Emley, tomorrow Glyndebourne? But think of the looks on their faces - must be worth it!

    See you in Darlo.

  4. Mister 4x4

    Mister 4x4 Member

    Someone made a comment about my instrument being out of tune a few nights ago at rehearsal (which is tuned prior to every rehearsal during warm-up, thank you very much), and I told him that it all sounded great from where I was sitting.

    Which drew much laughter from the rest of the band... although I'm still not entirely sure why.
  5. Charmed

    Charmed Active Member

    How about

    "It's not my fault, I'm sat in front of a radiator"

  6. trumpetmike

    trumpetmike Active Member

    "It was in tune when I got it"

    (unfortunately, I have heard this being said in all seriousness)
  7. Straightmute

    Straightmute Active Member

    And in a similar style "Harry Mortimer tuned this cornet in 1966 and I've not moved the slide since then".
  8. ronnie_the_lizard

    ronnie_the_lizard Active Member

    And in another similar style "It IS in tune - look the slide's pushed in exactly to the pencil mark......."
  9. GJG

    GJG Well-Known Member

    Small variation: "It was tuned at the factory"
  10. WoodenFlugel

    WoodenFlugel Moderator Staff Member

    ...and in [another] similar style I was sitting in another bands rehearsal while their conductor was trying to tune the band. One of the cornet players was struggling to play a consistant note so he said to her (this is the truth I swear) "give it to me I'll tune it....." :eek:

    Same conductor, whilst tuning the band to C said to someone else "use your triggers to pull it down a bit....".

    Needless to say this guy didn't last very long there.
  11. Steve

    Steve Active Member

    Remotely relevant is a story I know of a young man who struggled to get his trombone in tune and was advised to mark the slide for practicing so he knew where to put it for each note to be properly in tune. The pencil marking kept wearing off so his father thought it would be a good idea to use a hacksaw to mark the slide and proceeded to take it back to the shop complaining that since he put the tuning marks on, the trombone had become even harder to play.

  12. a very flat b

    a very flat b Member

    Who needs excuses - we're playing Images.............
  13. Accidental

    Accidental Supporting Member

    Hey, any excuse is better than just ignoring rotten tuning, or not realising!!

    My personal favourites - 'that note's always out of tune on this instrument' and 'its the mute'. hmmmm, so you own the only instrument in the world with immobile slides and no alternative fingerings then?
  14. SAbandman

    SAbandman New Member

    I'm going to use this at band practice-

    'I'm surprised at your choices melodically' Paula Abdul on American idol.
  15. FlugelD

    FlugelD Member

    Heard at band:

    'It's close enough for jazz'

    'Yeah, but this is Mozart....'
  16. ISBBBb2

    ISBBBb2 Member

    I often hear solo's played with a piano accompianment. One gentleman after playing a particulary badly tuned solo told me that the piano was out of tune!Selfishly the accompianist never thought to tune the piano to the soloist! Such pre-madonnas these pianists!

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