Medical Definitions

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by MRSH, Apr 7, 2004.

  1. MRSH

    MRSH Supporting Member

    Ever wondered what those complicated sounding medical terms actually mean. Well here's your answer:

    • Benign: What you be after you be eight.
    • Artery: The study of paintings.
    • Bacteria: Back door to cafeteria.
    • Barium: What doctors do when patients die.
    • Caesarean Section: .A neighbourhood in Rome.
    • Catscan: Searching for kitty.
    • Cauterize: Made eye contact with her.
    • Colic: A sheep dog.
    • Coma: A punctuation mark.
    • D & C: Where Washington is.
    • Dilate: To live long.
    • Enema: Not a friend.
    • Eyedropper (i'-drop-ur): A clumsy ophthalmologist.
    • Fester: Quicker than someone else.
    • Fibula: A small lie.
    • Genital: Non-Jewish person.
    • G. I. Series: World Series of military baseball.
    • Hangnail: What you hang your coat on.
    • Impotent: Distinguished, well known.
    • Labour Pain: Getting hurt at work.
    • Medical Staff: A Doctor's cane.
    • Morbid: A higher offer than I bid.
    • Nitrates: Cheaper than day.
    • Node: Was aware of.
    • Outpatient: A person who has fainted.
    • Pap Smear: A fatherhood test.
    • Pelvis: Second cousin to Elvis.
    • Post Operative: A letter carrier.
    • Recovery Room: Place to do upholstery.
    • Rectum: Darn near killed him.
    • Secretion: Hiding something.
    • Seizure: Roman emperor.
    • Tablet: A small table.
    • Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport.
    • Tumour: More than one.
    • Urine: Opposite of you're out.
    • Varicose: Nearby, close by.
    • Vein: Conceited