Joke: men think with their head and women with their heart

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by TheMusicMan, Jan 8, 2008.

  1. TheMusicMan

    TheMusicMan tMP Founder Staff Member

    Someone just sent me this, and I had been looking for the exact joke for a little while but not able to find it. Here it is... in all it's glory!

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    I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

    FOR EXAMPLE:

    One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

    I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

    So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

    'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

    She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

    Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

    The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

    We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

    I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.'

    I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

    Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

    I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

    And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

    Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.
    =================
     
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  3. agentorange

    agentorange Member

    Brilliant!!!!
     
  4. bigmamabadger

    bigmamabadger Active Member

    Um, wasn't this in the Baaaaad Joke thread earlier...
    BMB
    xx ;)
     
  5. Bass Man

    Bass Man Active Member

    Absolute Quality
     
  6. Thirteen Ball

    Thirteen Ball Active Member

    (In a churchill stylee) Awww Yos! :clap:
     
  7. Llamedos

    Llamedos Member

    Nice joke!But I disagree with the title!Men just....
    No I'm not going to go there-use your imagination!!:clap:
     
  8. Well Worth It

    Well Worth It Active Member

    Excellent!!!
     
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