Funny moments.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by Cornet Nev., Mar 15, 2008.

  1. Cornet Nev.

    Cornet Nev. Member

    What is the funniest thing that has happened either at a rehearsal, concert, or contest.
    For us, we were recently doing a concert, about half way through the second half, our first bass had a solo, the piece was called "Bass in the Ballroom", if any one knows it. Near the end the bass has a solo bit where a bit of improvisation can be done, but he really threw us by stopping, picking up his music, looking puzzled at it, then turned it upside down, put it back on the stand and then launched off into "Those Magnificent Men in Their Flying Machines" accompanied by our second man down cornet. It totally threw the rest of us and our MD but the audience loved it. He and second had conspired in secret for the event. Wonderful stuff. :D:D
  2. lilz

    lilz Member

    goddamn it i cant remember anything specifically funny, but band never fails to make me laugh with things no-one else but banders would understand is so funny.

    p.s banders is red dotted underlined, its deffinately a word though
  3. Hells Bones

    Hells Bones Active Member

    There was one where my old band had a gig at Uppermill Civic Hall, The solo Euph was moving his chair and went straight off the stage, would that be considered funny?
  4. ScotsGuyInWales

    ScotsGuyInWales New Member

    Back when I was a lad.... One of the local bands wasn't doing so well and needed some cornet players for a Masonic Parade thing in the evening. I think they'd mislaid all their cornet players. So anyway a bunch of us from WBJB went along to help. All went reasonably well until the conductor gave a double tap on the bass drum, we, of course being behind him, stopped marching but the front end didn't.... bump, bomp, bump, bomp into the darkness of a West Lothian night. Do you know how difficult it is to play when you're trying not laugh? Basses, trombones etc disappearing off stage front....:clap::biggrin:
  5. JesTperfect!

    JesTperfect! Member

    Our Bass Trombone player dropped his slide on a march once.
    Was one of the funniest things I've ever seen!
  6. sudcornet

    sudcornet Member

    From a web page I used to write...

    Over the Moors

    [SIZE=+1]My first story, surprisingly, was not alcohol induced.Some years ago, when I was a young sop player for Kirkbymoorside band, we received a request from the nearby Lingdale band. Could we help them out at a working men's club job up in Teeside. They were short of a sop player and a couple of solo cornets. In the true spirit of brass banding, and with the promise of a couple of drinks afterwards, John Sails ( Kirkbymoorside's superb principal cornet ), Phil Carter, and myself took the trek over the moors to help out. [/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+1]This particular WMC was in one of the less salubrious areas of industrial Teeside, the view from the fire escape where Phil and I had gone for a breath of fresh air presented row upon row of rather dismal terraced houses, the back yards of which all had either barbed wire or broken glass adorning their rear walls. During the interval and another breath of fresh air, Phil suggested swapping instruments for the second half, him being a former sop player. We swapped over, Phil blowing a few notes on the sop to reattune his lip. Instantly we were assailed by a barrage of abuse from one of the backyards below, some harridan with the charm and vocabulary of a psychotic fish-wife was informing us that her children ( God help them ) were trying to get to sleep and we weren't helping with our ******g noise. Witness two bandsmen making a hurried exit to the relative safety of the club. [/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+1]Upon our return we meet John Sails carrying a welcome round of drinks. He was keen to help when we told him of the nice lady outside who had requested the performance of a lullaby to usher her beautiful children into the Land of Nod. [/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+1]Minutes later we see the rapid return of a red-faced John Sails who had only managed a few bars of Brahms' Lullaby before receiving the verbal abuse of his life and a suggestion of a new position to place his instrument. [/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+1]We never played there again. [/SIZE]

    [SIZE=+3]Still over the Moors......[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=+1]A while later, actually a few hours later, ( Lingdale being quite generous with there "quick drink" time ) the bus heads home. By now the lurching around in the aisle has very little to do with the road surface, but, can be attributed to the cumulative effects of Newcastle Brown Ale. The point arrives when stretched bladders can no longer be ignored, so a chorus of "Stop the bus we want a wee wee" resounds from the back of the bus. A suitable lay-by has been spotted and the more desperate sprint off the bus and take up position in a row along the edge of the lay-by, "pointing percy" down the steep embankment. Sighs all along the row and then a shout. Heads turn to see a particularly drunken cornet player swaying in the doorway of the bus. His grip on reality and his sense of balance seem to all relax at once and he tumbles from the step. Momentum and a belly full of beer take him clear of the bus and deposit him on the back of one of the already peeing bandsmen. Another shout, this time a cry of annoyance and fear is followed by a blur of arms and legs as the two, entwined, bounce and tumble the thirty feet or so to the bottom of the embankment. Through the gloom it can be discerned that this debacle has not staunched our peeing members flow even with the inebriate cornetist still clinging to his back.[/SIZE]

  7. millie6589

    millie6589 Member

    i have a slight problem in that whenever we play anything paricularly slow or quiet, me and tim, our first horn, collapse into fits of laughter for no real reason other than that one of us has usually just made a horrendous mistake....and even in other pieces that aren't so slow and quiet, we can usually find something to set us off...we can usually contain ourselves when we have concerts etc but rehearsals are always a right laugh
  8. Cyndy

    Cyndy Member

    Carnival parade,solo trombone attached lyre to end of slide!!!
  9. Euphgit

    Euphgit Member

    Parade, on of our Eb players was ****ed as a fart, we marched onto the fair field, past a tent, he tripped on a guide rope and broke his ankle

    Theres also the time on another parade, where the bass player who was on the front row far right, decided to take a different route to the rest of the parade, with me (concentrating on the music) following him
  10. andyp

    andyp Active Member

    Thing is most hilarious band moments tend to be of the "you had to be there" variety, and lose a bit in the there's so many of them!

    Sticking to the family-friendly ones (about 10%...:oops:)...

    - Whit Friday, (Lydgate? - the one with the permanent stage made of flags anyway..), Viva Birkenshaw. Bass trom goes for an unwritten third repeat of the bass solo. Four fff blastissimo notes, (over rest of band at pp for the Trio) followed by a loud " OH £$%@!

    Bass trom leaves the stage at the end to huge round of applause!

    but still my favourite, Marple's annual Vice Presidents concert, second half, 2nd bari player is leaving to have a baby, is thanked for all her hard work etc and presented with a huge bunch of flowers. MD then asks if the proud father would stand up........all 16 male members of the band stand up.

    Collapse of entire audience into hysterics.
  11. omega56

    omega56 Member

    After a hard days contesting at some outpost of a venue all the competing bandspeople converged to hear the results, the chairs, music stands were cleared from the stage,the only thing remaining were the pools of accumulated "spit " (mainly in the basses area ) which had formed into surprisingly large puddles. Out came the civic party,officials,sponsor,(you get the picture) The lady who I presume was the mayoress made over to the opposite side of the stage where the trophies were all nicely lined up ready to be taken away by their proud winners,unfortunatley she never quite made the distance as she performed a rather impressive skid right through the afforementionred puddle, flailling madly,handbag going in all directions,she avoided the total embarressment of actually hitting the deck by grabbing her Husbands Mayoral chain of office as he tried to assist her in her predicament,this obviously took him by surprise and off balance but he was`nt going to suffer the indignity of landing in a heap either and managed to grab the solitary microphone stand,dislodging the mike which hit the stage with an amplified C L O N K ! ! and then continued to whistle with feedback until someone switched if off,there was a stunned silence from the audience until the trombone section of one of the bands rose to their feet as a man to start the applause followed by everone else in the auditorium

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