Looking through the thread "conductor put downs" reminded me of my first band I joined. Typical village band with lots of poor playing. The type of people in the band didn't want to get told off for making the same mistakes over and over so used to come up with a different excuse each time. I am sure some were true but there was so many that the conductor in exasperation and light heartedly started an "excuse book" and each time a new excuse was given wrote it down. He kept it going until he died! - it must be around some where still. How many excuses have other people heard at band practices out there? - post below and give us all a laugh. I do remember the first in the book was :- I've got the wrong teeth in. poor chap actually had picked up the wrong set of false teeth!!!!!