Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by amgray, Jul 2, 2004.

  1. amgray

    amgray Member

    Apologies if you have seen some of these before;

    After insulting Bass sections in a previous post, next week I 'ar mostly be insulting Flugels :)

    Why are band concert intermissions limited to 20 minutes?
    So you don't have to retrain the drummers.

    What did the drummer get on his IQ test?


    How do you know when a drummer is knocking at your door?

    The knock always slows down.

    How do you get a drummer to play an accelerando?

    Ask him to play in 4/4 at a steady 120 bpm.

    Why do bands have bass players?

    To translate for the drummer.

    Did you hear about the time the bass player locked his keys in the car?
    It took two hours to get the drummer out.

    How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?

    "Why? Oh, wow! Is it like dark, man?"
    Only one, but he'll break ten bulbs before figuring out that they can't just be pushed in.
    Two: one to hold the bulb, and one to turn his throne (but only after they figure out that you have to turn the bulb).
    Twenty. One to hold the bulb, and nineteen to drink until the room spins.
    None. They have a machine to do that.

    Why is it good that drummers have a half-ounce more brains than horses?
    So they don't disgrace themselves in parades.

    What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?

    With a drum machine you only have to punch the information in once.

    Heard backstage: "Will the musicians and the drummer please come to the stage!"

    A drummer, sick of all the drummer jokes, decides to change his instrument. After some thought, he decides on the accordion. So he goes to the music store and says to the owner, "I'd like to look at the accordions, please."
    The owner gestures to a shelf in the corner and says "All our accordions are over there."
    After browsing, the drummer says, "I think I'd like the big red one in the corner."
    The store owner looks at him and says, "You're a drummer, aren't you?"
    The drummer, crestfallen, says, "How did you know?"
    The store owner says, "That `big red accordion' is the radiator."
  2. akwarose

    akwarose Active Member

    hehe great!!! i love them... just be careful of drummergurl.... she may wish to hurt you after reading those!
  3. Well Worth It

    Well Worth It Active Member

    At least get hold of some new material!
  4. Naomi McFadyen

    Naomi McFadyen New Member

    I dont think it's drummergurl you have to be careful of :evil: :twisted: :twisted: :evil: :evil: :evil: :twisted:

  5. drummergurl

    drummergurl Active Member

    lol nah u dont have worry bout me, most of em sound true! :D especially if u give me a set of keys for a band room for today :lol: (naruco will know wot im on about!)
  6. akwarose

    akwarose Active Member

    ooh come on, tell all!!!!!

    and nao... dont kill him, his band probably need him, although i'm not entirely sure....
  7. drummergurl

    drummergurl Active Member

    it took us about 15mins to unlock 1 door!!!! and theres 3 u have to unlock to get into our bandroom!! luckily the other 2 didnt take as long to unlock! i have 5keys to choose from and none of them seemed to unlock the door! ill be having fun when i have to unlock the bandroom on my own on thursday :shock: :shock: :shock:
  8. Liz Courts

    Liz Courts Active Member

    :lol: :lol: Lol!! You have to wiggle the key to our bandroom about quite a bit until you can get in!! :lol: Can be a lot of fun, especially when it's raining!! :shock:
  9. akwarose

    akwarose Active Member

    bless :roll: :roll:

    i cannot believe you are 15 and you cant unlock 3 doors......shocking
  10. mikelyons

    mikelyons Supporting Member

    What do they teach them in schools these days? :)
  11. IckleSop

    IckleSop Active Member

    Drummers are the 2nd best section in the band you have to worry about the basses!
  12. drummerboy

    drummerboy Member

    2nd best?!? I think you'll find we are best best! :p
  13. IckleSop

    IckleSop Active Member

    no the sop is the best!
  14. drummerboy

    drummerboy Member

    Hardly a section though :p But a good sop player is always good. :)
  15. mikelyons

    mikelyons Supporting Member

    What's the difference between a drummer and a percussionist?

    A drummer is still surprised when something he hits makes a noise. :)
  16. drummergurl

    drummergurl Active Member

    it was one door where u had turn key to the left and not to the right (that was the 2nd bit we had to work out) 1st we had to decide which key it was!! then it was actually gettin the key to turn in the lock. it took a long time!!!
  17. Well Worth It

    Well Worth It Active Member

    'Ere ladies!
    Now that someone has kindly donated a thread to specifically drummers, why not keep it running?
    Now that percussion is becoming more and more vital to the movement, I think we deserve at least one thread to swap, chat, ask, tell and talk TAMA if we want to....?
  18. amgray

    amgray Member

    ...but will it be kept going with a regular and consistent tempo and rhythm? :twisted: :twisted:
  19. Naomi McFadyen

    Naomi McFadyen New Member

    :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:


    As with the bandroom and key incident yesterday.......... no comment :oops: .... *mutters... stoopid door*

  20. drummergurl

    drummergurl Active Member

    LOL :oops: :oops: :oops: more like stoooooooooooooooooooooooooooopid door