Concert Waffle

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by 2nd man down, Apr 25, 2004.


Natural orator or "Oh just sit down, pleeeease!!"

  1. Ours is a star and keeps them captivated/in stitches

  2. Hmmm...where does he/she get this rubbish?

  3. And to think I could have been watching Corrie

    0 vote(s)
  4. We have a compare so we're ok

    0 vote(s)
  1. 2nd man down

    2nd man down Moderator Staff Member

    :? Well, here goes...we touched on this in the pub last night and I said I would so...
    What does your MD/Conductor babble on about to the audience at concerts??
    We sat and listened to ours warble on last one point i expected to see Well Worth It hang himself, he seemed to have lost the will to is yours a master of the anecdote and king of the pun or do you wish he'd/she'd (or even you) get swallowed by a big hole in the ground? :twisted: And I'm sure none of them read this and the ones that do are reasonable people that can take constructive please, post freely

    (Only joking boss, you're a top bloke and I like sitting where I am thank you very much!!) :roll: :wink:
  2. Nuke

    Nuke Active Member

    Must have been the audience that didnt understand his jokes. I dont think many people did really cause that one about the elephant didnt make much sense really.
  3. Big Twigge

    Big Twigge Active Member

    My favourite line in the compering last night was the introduction of pastime with good company......pure genius Roger :!: :!: :!:
  4. 2nd man down

    2nd man down Moderator Staff Member

    What did he say :?: :?:
  5. Nat

    Nat Member

    our conductor usually just explains the pieces and introduces solo's ect- nothing flash!
  6. The Cornet King

    The Cornet King Active Member

    Ours can talk a wee bit of waffle at times! :) (sorry Gov!)

    Nothing tooo embarassing but a few things tend to go rather off topic! Like talking about the beach at Filey....or Shostakovich's symphonies! :eek:

    Good fun though!
  7. WoodenFlugel

    WoodenFlugel Moderator Staff Member

    Our conductor does all the compering, and makes a pretty good job of it, although he did once introduce me as "a better flugel player than Barbara Streisand" :shock: :? :lol:
  8. ploughboy

    ploughboy Active Member

    I have to start sticking up for the conductor's and myself it would seem!! :lol:

    It's not easy, trying to be informative and funny or whatever we're suposed to be! I've sat through some very dull compere's. My apologies for all those I've bored to tears during my "waffle".

    I here by swear that i will work harder at been interesting in the future :D . Anyway, I'm a musician not a speech writer!!

    (by the way crawford, I voted for the top answer :wink: )
  9. 2nd man down

    2nd man down Moderator Staff Member

    Was only joking...keep it up!!
  10. Roger Thorne

    Roger Thorne Active Member

    This is an interesting subject. Gary is quite right with what he says. It certainly isn't an easy job having to conduct a band and compere the entire concert. We had our Spring Concert last night and I spent about 6 hours preparing notes and information to use during the evening. Although I had informative notes prepared for every piece, I was able to digress from these and ad lib (waffle) quite a bit. One thing I personally don't try and attempt is telling jokes or funny stories, I'm just no good at it. I much prefer to feed off the audience whenever possible, and I think if you can warm to the audience from the outset you can keep them in the palm of your hand all evening.

    Right at the start of our concert last night as I was welcoming the audience etc., a lady arrived late and was wondering about looking for a seat. Straight away I made her a direct target and started a personal conversation with her, guiding her to a seat and then taking advantage of the fact that she decided to take for ages to settle down. This initially broke the ice, and straight away the audience are laughing and relaxed. This atmosphere certainly helps prepare for the rest of the evening. I also think it helps to settle the band too.

    I think from the players point of view, a conductor who can 'waffle' for ages and keep the audiences attention is worth their weight in gold, particularly if you are performing a 'heavy' programme. I know a few of the Wem crowd appreciated it last night.

    I realise that MD's take a lot of stick for their compering, but as I've always stated at Wem, if anyone is prepared to 'give it a go' the stage is all yours - Incidentally, I'm still waiting for volunteers to step forward!

  11. super_sop

    super_sop Supporting Member

    i certainly did Rog especially before we played zulu!
  12. Well Worth It

    Well Worth It Active Member

    That's all well and good Roger, but it's when the conductor seems to have little idea concerning what he's expounding on, that my sympathy is extended to the speaker.
    The anecdotes and one-liners, I feel, are very important to a compere.
    The audience are unlikely to give you their full attention if you are merely "educating" them. It reminds us too much of listening to a lecture at school. It is better to give your audience a more difficult decision to make. Do they risk chatting through your spiels and risk missing the punchline to BAFTA contending comedy or do they listen to what you're saying and gamble on not finding your jokes funny at all.
    Even if a compere has all the humour of a desicrated iceberg lettuce, the WORST possible jokes, told in good taste, will still engage your audience and obtain a reaction - even a sigh/tut/shake of the head.
    A reaction is how the compere can judge his chatter. No reaction (tumbleweed and distant church bells tolling), is terrible, confidence-sapping and makes a unison, disparaging, shake of the head seem like a standing ovation.
    The idea, I believe, is to make each person in the audience share the same emotions in between pieces, ie happy/suprised/suicidal(2md?).
    This done, they will be much more in tune to what the band are trying to do. If you want them to clap during an item, and two minutes ago they were all laughing together, there is already a unified psychological bond shared throughout the auditorium, and as long as someone starts them off, they are far more likely to join in.

    Whilst I have looked at this from the point of view experienced by those who would NEVER stand up with a mike in front of a room full of people,
    I have full respect for all public speakers.

    Remember that the audience are always listening at the start of your programme whilst concentration is strong. It is up to the compere to lose their audience not the other way round.
  13. Vickitorious

    Vickitorious Active Member

    Ours is brilliant! He always has the audience and the band in stitches! :D
  14. Dave Payn

    Dave Payn Active Member

    Roger's absolutely spot on. It ain't easy being a compere and conductor. I've improved (I didn't say I'm any good, just improved) at compering, but it's something that I don't always feel comfortable with. I should remember Roger's advice not to try and crack gags, but with me it's a habit! (desspite its lack of success!). My line of work has often helped me with information about composers/arrangers, so I'm quite fortunate in that respect.

    The most nightmarish scenario was two years ago with Fulham Brass Band when they went to Leutkirch in Germany for a few days. I had the programme notes written down for our flugel player's dad to translate into German, (helped by the fact I have a smattering) and read from these German notes in the concert. I even got a laugh (probably sympathy) for the one gag I cracked! (Who says German's don't have a sense of humour? Well if they laugh at my gags, they can't possibly have!)
  15. I remember being at an army festival when the compere spent more time that night talking than the band did playing (sometime did actually time them both). That was well shocking!
  16. Ste69

    Ste69 Member

    I think that to the audience it's always interesting. Unfortunately (or fortunately for them), they haven't heard it 8 times. :roll:

    Actually, ours is very good I think...Knows his stuff and delivers it well.

    Well, that's according to some of my mates who came to the last concert :!:
  17. ScrapingtheBottom

    ScrapingtheBottom Active Member

    Our MD has some quality chat, especially when he has to put up with crazy announcers.
  18. Raspberry

    Raspberry Member

    Hey Chris you thought that woman was crazy, how about the man at one of the Miners Welfare places last Christmas "Bestwood, bestwood, bestwood, fantastic band, bestwood, bestwood" .........

    From what I understand is that the blokes vocabulary was somewhat limited and our MD was gobsmacked. :lol:

    Don't forget we'll be in for that treat again at Christmas!
  19. stephen2001

    stephen2001 Member

    I am a radio presenter at the university radio station. The only time that we've had any official listenership figure through, there were around 20 thousand listeners and I really did not think anything of it.
    When it comes to public speaking, even if to just 4 or 5 people, I get sooo nervous!
    I really do think that conductor-comperes do a brilliant job.
  20. Will the Sec

    Will the Sec Active Member

    I always offer my services, ostensibly to give the conductor the option of abdicating responsibility if they wish to, but I rarely get a response.

    For our last gig, Paul got one of his mates to do it. It was difficult to work out how well he went down, because I couldn't hear him being at the back of the stage.

    I was nominated to talk about going to the nationals ahead of a bucket collection, so I wrote down a few lines, looked at them a few times, forgot to take them with me on Friday morning, and so went to the front of the stage with air in my head.

    I got a few facts wrong; mixing up DP1's length of Fulham service with Guy's and forgot Asako when listing our overseas contingent. The throat went very dry, but I managed to get the point across, and thank a few individual members of the audience for coming. I went back to my seat thinking what a prat I must have seemed, only to get pats on the back afterwards and people asking did I write the script and where did I learn to speak in public like that?

    Would I do it again? Of course! I'm a show off.

    It isn't everyone's cup of tea, though, and if you are going to freeze on stage, or bore the pants off everyone, or don't wish to rabbit as well as stick wagging, get someone else to do it!

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