Hi All, I’m in need of help with a band jokes page that I’m putting together for our new website (www.driffieldband.com) My current list is shown below but more would be good. Cheers all. Trebor A young child says to his mother, ''Mom, when I grow up I'd like to be a musician.'' She replies, ''Well honey, you know you can't do both.'' Q: What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm? A: A tattoo. Q: What do you call a drummer in a three-piece suit? A: ''The Defendant'' Q: What is the difference between a horn section and a '57 Chevy? A: You can tune a '57 Chevy. Q: What do you need when a group of conductors are up to their necks in concrete? A: More concrete. Q: What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test? A: Saliva. Q: What's the similarity between a drummer and a philosopher? A: They both perceive time as an abstract concept. Q: What would a cornet player do if he won a million dollars? A: Continue to play gigs until the money ran out. Q: What's the best way to confuse a drummer? A: Put a sheet of music in front of him. Q: What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians? A: A drummer. Q: Did you hear about the time the bass player locked his keys in the car? A: Yeah, it took two hours to get the drummer out. Q: Why did they bury the conductor 20 feet under? A: Because deep down, he was a really nice guy. Q: What's the difference between a dead trombonist and a dead squirrel in the road? A: The squirrel might have been on its way to a gig. Q: What's the difference between a cornet player and the rear end of a horse? A: I don't know either. Q: What's the difference between drummers and government bonds? A: Government bonds eventually mature and earn money.