Best Programme Bloopers?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by andyh, Jan 2, 2009.

  1. andyh

    andyh Supporting Member

    As mentioned in another thread "Share My Yolk" and "National Anthum"...

    What other gems have people unearthed/committed in their concert programmes?

  2. steve sizeland

    steve sizeland New Member

    How about a spoken comment from the MD/Compere introducing a euph solo "As we couldn't get our first choice euph player for tonight, .........."
  3. carlwoodman

    carlwoodman Member

    The ISB visited Colchester in 2006 and gave a concert at Colchester Institute.
    The brochure for the concert season mentioned that the ISB had recorded a CD of works by Winifred Heaton.
  4. Will the Sec

    Will the Sec Active Member

    Mr Sykes tells of the time he was listed as playing a piece called "Charred ****".
  5. WoodenFlugel

    WoodenFlugel Moderator Staff Member

    We did a parks concert where the programme stated we were playing "A Garlic Dressing" instead of A Gaelic Blessing...
  6. DannyCollin

    DannyCollin Member

    Diana Jones and the Temple of Boom
  7. DannyCollin

    DannyCollin Member

    OOOOOOOOO ya little namedropper you ;)
  8. Will the Sec

    Will the Sec Active Member

    Hardly. He told me and about three hundred other people at an entertainments contest at Southend.
  9. David Mann

    David Mann Member

    Lets face the dance and music, by an otherwise impeccable Swiss announcer.
  10. ronnie_the_lizard

    ronnie_the_lizard Active Member

    A certain Mr Renton introduced 'Listen to the Band' by explaining how the Yorkshire Imperial band had it's roots in the steelworking community of Sheffield - which would be great except the Band started at the Yorkshire COPPERworks in LEEDS .......Doh!!
  11. on_castors

    on_castors Member

    How about that well known Christmas tune "Spleen" or perhaps, more traditionally: "Smoke Songs from Somerset"
  12. bbg

    bbg Member

    Not a programme as such, but for our Band's tour to Holland and Germany last summer, it was decided that the civic greeting (the visit was centred in our twin town) should be translated into German for the self-produced brochure. One Google Translation later, and to much hilarity amongst readers on tour, "Perthshire Brass" became "Perthshire Alloy of Copper and Zinc" whilst the word "band" translated throughout as "ribbon"..........there were more, but these are the ones that will remain in Band folklore for a long time!
  13. 4thmandown

    4thmandown Member

    From a City of Birmingham Christmas concert of many years ago "The Christmas Snog":)
  14. PeterBale

    PeterBale Moderator Staff Member

    You mean: "I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus" ;)
  15. Thirteen Ball

    Thirteen Ball Active Member

    Our top cornet was recently anounced as playing - "Concert Study by... erm... Godrick" - because the anouncer couldn't pronounce Goedicke.

    I was once listed as playing "Did you wanna Tuba?" in stead of "Tijuana Tuba" because the programme was passed on over a rather crackly phone line.
  16. floppymute

    floppymute Member

    Our compere once announced 'The Radetsky March' by Johann Sebastian Strauss.
    Some years back I remember Henry Kelly on Classic fm announce
    Beethoven's Moonlight Sinatra!!
  17. Masterblaster jnr

    Masterblaster jnr Active Member

    I went to a concert with Skelmanthorpe at Formby Hall in Atherton in November i think, and looking through the programme they were going to play a piece called 'J J Mathias', which when it came to it turned out to be trumpet Blues and Cantabile
  18. Flugelgeoff

    Flugelgeoff Member

    Just prior to Xmas I was guest conducting a band with a similar name as my regular band. You've got it....... I introduced the band by my bands name!!!! Not got the greatest of memories. :oops:
  19. Red Elvis

    Red Elvis Active Member

    Was before mytime , but members of my band tell the story of one year at the East Anglian contest in Norwich , and a competing band palyed "Gaudete".....Introduced by the announcer , in broad Norfolk tones as "Gowdet" (
  20. The Wherryman

    The Wherryman Active Member

    When Wymondham (in Norfolk) is pronounced "Windam" and Happisborough (also Norfolk) is said as "Haze-bra", I reckon he was pretty lucky to get that close :p

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