Be proud to be British because:

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by Mrs Womble, Dec 8, 2004.

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  1. Mrs Womble

    Mrs Womble Member

    Only in Britain... can pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

    Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

    Only in Britain... do people order cheeseburgers, large fries and a diet coke.

    Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counter

    Only in we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

    Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have "call waiting" so we don't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place

    Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink


    * 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
    *142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
    *58 Brits are injured each year by using sharo knives instead of scewdrivers
  2. brasscrest

    brasscrest Active Member

    Not true - we have them here, too :)
  3. Jan H

    Jan H Moderator Staff Member

    I don't know if it makes you feel any better, but we have all those things over here too!!! :-?;)
  4. six pints

    six pints Active Member

    perhaps we could rename it only on earth...?

    they were very funny tho!!
  5. ScrapingtheBottom

    ScrapingtheBottom Active Member

    Not all disabled people are in wheelchairs. :-?
  6. Chris Sanders

    Chris Sanders Active Member

    Want that one...
  7. trumpetmike

    trumpetmike Well-Known Member

    Not true - you ever been to the US?

    To be fair, pens are easy to steal, whilst everything else is behind lock and key. A good attempt at humour, but very misleading. Have you ever tried to get money out of the bank? You don't just walk in and take it from a big pile.

    True, but lawnmowers are small enough to steal easily and tend not to have alarms, immobilisers and locks already built into them.

    If you are seriously suggesting that disabled people shouldn't be allowed near an ice rink I would consider this one of the most offensive posts on any forum. My Uncle is in a wheelchair. Does this mean that when he, my Aunt and my cousin go to the ice rink, he should stay in the car? Are you suggesting that he shouldn't be allowed in?
    Or are you putting forward the suggestion that it is the lazy people who can't manage a walk across the car park should be allowed to park nearest to the entrance, whilst those who might not find walking a reasonable option have to get across from the other side of the car park?

    I am very pleased that the places nearest to ice rinks, swimming pools, shopping centres, supermarkets etc are set aside for disabled access. My view on this particular matter is that anybody who parks in one of these spaces without having a legitimate reason (in other words, being disabled) should be injured in such a way that they will qualify - then they have to struggle from the other side of the car park - see how they like it!

    The local Sainsburys here has started clamping cars that park in those spaces, unless they are displaying the disabled parking badge. I overheard one customer getting very irate about having been clamped - when it was explained to him the reason why his BMW was now the proud wearer of a clamp he complained saying that he "had only popped in for a quick sandwich." It is people like this who make my Aunt & Uncle's life more frustrating. May anybody who parks in a disabled space, when not allowed, rot in hell!

    If this comes across as very negative - it was supposed to be. The idea of the "only in Britain" was slightly amusing, but if you had just had a moment of thought before you posted it you would realise just how much rubbish was within it.

    Disabled access for ice rinks - great idea - let them have all the spaces nearest to the venue. If you have ever had to get a wheelchair acorss the average car park in this country, you will know what a struggle it can be.
  8. Chris Sanders

    Chris Sanders Active Member

    Wanted... GSOH... Apply within... ;)
  9. Keppler

    Keppler Moderator Staff Member

    While the original post was obviously intended in a light hearted manner, trumpetmike certainly raises a few decent points. I agree with you mike, I saw someone in a commercial van pull into a disabled parking spot yesterday, remain in the van to eat a sandwich, and then drive off. People with this sense of selflessness and thoughtfulness deserve to have nasty things done to them.
  10. TheMusicMan

    TheMusicMan tMP Founder Staff Member

    Hmmmm.... I am not too sure at the moment where this thread is going to end up! I am 100% certain that the original posters intent was most definately not to inflame or to offend anyone, and I am somewhat surprised to see some of the responses here. Understandable that some people are going to read the original comments in different ways, but surely... to suggest that someone is intentionally trying to offend disabled people is a little OTT. Nobody wants to do that.

    Our Moderator team strives to be as politically correct as needed on tMP and they all work very hard behind the scenes to show fair play and pragmatism to as many people as we can. We work tirelessly to effect a considered balance in our approach and will continue to do so.
  11. 2nd man down

    2nd man down Moderator Staff Member

    I'd just like to add my four penneth here if I may, I know Linda and there is no way on this earth that she would intentionally look to insult or poke fun at people with disabilities.
    The joke was meant in a light hearted and ironic manner and will certainly not have been intended to cause upset.

    We're heading for a pretty dull world if we're not allowed to see the ironic side of things.

    It's like the "No Pony Trekking" sign in my local cemetary...What dead person wants to go pony trekking anyway?!?!? (No offence intended to any corpses who may be reading this.)
  12. Mrs Womble

    Mrs Womble Member

    Thank you to those who have stuck up for me and hang on everyone else!!!! It was posted in a light hearted way and not to upset people! Infact a lady who I work with sent me this and she's in a wheelchair herself after a serious car accident 8 years ago, the same accident she lost her husband in. I'm not a bad person and I like a laugh and a joke like the rest of us,

    I would also like to add that my father and my family have for the past 30 odd years have raise a lot of money for a charity called Peter Le Marchant Trust. This charity provides day trips and short holidays for physically and mentally disabled adults and children on specially built boats. As a young girl and young adult I've given up my free time to help out on the boats, helping people who can't do the same things I enjoy doing, who have never had the experience or adventures like what what I have had, and i'm pleased to add that i enjoyed giving my free time to help others. I also used to be a helper in a school for special needs children when I was at college doing a NVQ in heath and social care.

    So as you can see I don't like making fun of people who are physically and mentally disabled, as you know it was sent to me by someone with a disability who found it funny herself so having received it from that particular source i saw no harm in letting others benefit from it's humour.

    Thats all i'm saying on this matter.

  13. TheMusicMan

    TheMusicMan tMP Founder Staff Member

    2nd Man Down and Linda

    I agree with what you have said in your last two posts and was - in my post - supporting you in as best a manner as I could as Admin/Owner here on tMP.
  14. 2nd man down

    2nd man down Moderator Staff Member

    Thank you John...despite what people say about you I think you're ok and welcome to marry my sister any day.
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 9, 2004
  15. Cornishwomble

    Cornishwomble Active Member

    Yet again the yoghurt knitters try to let political correctness get in the way of a tongue in cheek ironic look at life. What a sad place we are living in.
  16. iancwilx

    iancwilx Well-Known Member

    Come on Trumpetmike - lighten up.
    I would suggest the whole posting was intended in a light hearted vein - just a bit of a smile, you know, turn up the sides of your mouth and make a noise like "Ha ! Ha !"
    No one intends any disparagement of the disabled. I'm quite sure 100% of tmp- ers have every sympathy with anyone in that unfortunate position.
    There are too many types always on the look out to put on a grim disapproving face about any petty, trivial, so called, contravention of the strict PC code of practice.
    The foundations of most PC guidelines are based on best civilised practice, but come on, let's have a bit of levity now and again.
    I can almost see your lips pursing in rage at what you will take as my flippant attitude to a serious breach of PC etiquette, but all I'm suggesting is that Society has to "Breath". It can't be constrained in a rule ridden straight jacket.
    I hope you, me, our loved ones and all the rest of those who wish to celebrate Christmas and New Year have a real fun Festive Frolic.
    "A Very Merry Christmas To You All"
  17. bigmamabadger

    bigmamabadger Active Member

    I found this post quite upsetting. I myself have been a keen yoghurt-knitter for many years now and I defy anyone to say we are sad hobbyist people. Why, only the other day Mrs. Thistlebottom upset a whole carton of Loseley Hall Farm Finest Black Cherry and Honeycomb over the minutes of the previous weeks AGM. It wasn't funny at the time, but how we laugh about it now.
    Why don't you come and join us one week, Roy? I'm sure we can get you started with a nice simple pattern in, say, Sainsbury's Plain Bio?
    Mrs. Badger
  18. HBB

    HBB Active Member

    Knitting has its place....

  19. ScrapingtheBottom

    ScrapingtheBottom Active Member

    I'm sorry there is no way you can take the 'ice rink' statement any other way than offensive. It is an attempt to assert the pointlessness of disabled parking spaces in front of ice rinks because obviously people who are disabled don't ice skate or know any one who does.

    The moral of the story is think before you post. I also wish people would not jump on those who point out that things may be offensive on this forum. tMP is meant for all not just those who find jokes about disabled people funny. 'Lightening up' does not mean tolerating prejudicial remarks whether they are unintended or not.

  20. 2nd man down

    2nd man down Moderator Staff Member

    I'm sorry, I still think you're missing the point here somewhat...if this "joke" was originally sent by someone with a disability and who is confined to a wheelchair themselves because they could see the funny side of the irony, how can it possibly be taken as offensive??

    That's like telling Scottish people they can't tell Scottish jokes because it pokes fun at the Scottish!! HUH?!?!?!?? (and before anyone starts on me for picking on the Scots...I'm a very proud jock thank you very much).
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