Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by TheMusicMan, Dec 4, 2003.
What do you call a sousaphone quartet????
A tuba four.
After a controversial decision at the National Finals . . .
Is lèse-majesté a hanging offence, or will I get away with 20 years in the Scrubs?
In case of any doubt, I meant "lèse-majesté against adjudicators", rather than against HM, who - like her late mother - is noted for her sense of humour!
Hhaahhhhhaaaa!! That's funny.
I love such threads.
Me: I'm actually happy right now.
Life: LOL!! One sec.
Q. What do you call a sleep-walking nun?
A. A roamin' Catholic!
Q. What's red and bad for your teeth?
A. A brick!
I want a job cleaning mirrors - I can really see myself doing that . . .
Did you hear about the two blokes who stole a calendar? They each got six months!
If you ever feel really cold, go and stand in a corner; they're usually about 90 degrees!
Collect the full set . . . .
Some women tell me that kissing a man without a beard is like eating an egg without salt.
Not that I'd know; I've never eaten an egg without salt . . .
A pig walks into a bar, orders 15 beers and drinks them. The bartender asks, "Would you like to know where the bathroom is?"
"No," says the pig. "I'm the little piggy that goes wee-wee-wee all the way home."
Q. What colour socks do bears wear?
A. Bears don't wear socks - they have bare feet!
I couldn't work out how to fasten the seat belt in my new car - then it clicked.
Q. What begins with an 'E', ends with an 'E', but only has one letter?
A. An envelope!
Q. How do you organise a party in space?
A. You planet!
Q. What do you call a stuck-up criminal going down stairs?
A. A condescending con descending!
Q. What happens to nitrogen when the sun rises?
A. It becomes daytrogen!
Good nitrogen; sleep tightrogen; don't let the bed-bugs bitrogen!
"This guy should go far - and the further, the better!"
Separate names with a comma.