Advice for foreigners in Britain

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by PeterBale, May 13, 2004.

  1. PeterBale

    PeterBale Moderator Staff Member

    Messages:
    20,502
    Location:
    Hadleigh, Essex
    Having listened to the Gerard Hoffnung tape yesterday, to hear the "Barrel of Bricks" story, I came across some advice for foreign visitors to britain - and if it sounds a little dated, remember it was recorded in 1958:

    • You will oblige your chambermaid by hanging your mattress out of the window every morning

      All London brothels display a blue lamp

      Ignore all signs saying left or right - these are merely political slogans

      Zebra parking places are freely available

      Have you tried the famous echo in the Reading Room at the British Museum?

      On entering a railway compartment, make sure you shake hands with all who are present
     
  2. littlemisshorns

    littlemisshorns Member

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    294
    Location:
    Armadale, West Lothian
    Amazing how times change eh?
     
  3. lynchie

    lynchie Active Member

    Messages:
    5,057
    Location:
    South London
    when i first came to this country I followed all these rules... and ended up a trombone player... :cry:
     
  4. Naomi McFadyen

    Naomi McFadyen New Member

    Messages:
    10,577
    Location:
    Manchester
    and thats a bad thing, Lynchie?
    ;-)


    but yea, some interesting advice there Peter! :lol:
     
  5. ScrapingtheBottom

    ScrapingtheBottom Active Member

    Messages:
    1,323
    Location:
    In a dark, dark place.
    Zebra parking spaces are really useful. I know the police always like to use them cos they always make me move when I'm parked in one.
     
  6. Tuba Miriam

    Tuba Miriam Member

    Messages:
    118
    Location:
    Surrey
    Gerard Hoffnung - very funny. He's the chap in my avatar. He also commissioned (I think it was him) a 'concerto for double bass tuba and piccolo' and is responsible for Malcolm Arnold writing the 'Grand, Grand Festival Overture' for the 1956 Hoffnung Music Festival, which features a full symphony orchestra plus vacuum cleaners and floor polishers. :shock:

    For more information on Hoffnung see:
    http://www.musicweb.uk.net/hoffnung/
     
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